Big Picture

Of His and Her : 8

2011-10-20T21:49:00.000-07:00

It was a week before Diwali. The festive season had already kicked in and everything around them was filled with the Diwali celebrations! Of what would they be doing, how they will be celebrating it, booking the tickets to home. This time too they were going to travel together. But this isn’t about that. That day he dropped her home like many other days after her classes. And after about half an hour of chatting at the gate and before saying that final bye she unveiled her plans of the evening. She and her room mates were going to the Paataleshwar temple. It was Deepotsava and the temple was going to be adorned with 1 lakh diyas / lamps. Her eyes twinkled with the mention of it. And she seemed very excited about that. He loved when her eyes sparkled like that. And out of nowhere she asked him whether he would like to join them too.

He was caught unarmed. He liked the idea of spending an evening with her but with all her friends and that too in a temple lighting diyas? He wasn’t so sure.

“Will see .. I will let you know later “is all he could reply then.

She smiled and ran inside. Staying at a girl’s hostel, he wasn’t allowed inside of that gate. A good friendship had grown much thicker in the new unknown town. And this had become a routine. He would usually pick her up after her class; they would either have a tea or a coffee together at a roadside stall with a bunch of friends or then spend that half an hour at the gate if she had assignments to submit the next day. If not, they would either take a stroll to the paataleshwar or to the shaniwaarwada. Sit there and talk. Talk about just anything. About life, dreams, hopes, music and movies.

She knew he would come and he knew that too. So there he was at the gate waiting for her in the evening. She was wearing a very simple yellow colored cotton salwaar which he had seen her in many times. They smiled and starting walking towards the temple. All of them together. The evening was growing with each passing minute. Initially unaware of what to do, they finally found a spot for themselves and settled in. Lighting the diyas. From one to the next. Silently, peacefully. Concentrating so as not to spill the oil. For the first one, he pulled out his left hand to pick one diya but she promptly but gently snapped him asking him to use his right hand.

She was too excited to see how the temple will look when all the diyas would be lighted. The temple was filled with many people. All of whom had happily volunteered for the event. Some others were putting rangolis in varied patterns.

With the entire hula boo around, they were lighting the diyas. Stealing those glances once in a while. Listening without talking. For the first time they were together and not talking. And it was not uncomfortable. It was pure and calming. Eventually, after the sunset it became dark. Beneath the twinkling stars, they saw the thousands of diyas all lit and twinkling. And he looked at her. She never looked more beautiful. The golden light of the diyas made her dress and skin look radiant too. And to add it her smile. She was glad that he could join her. Somewhere inside they both felt happy like never before.

Finally it was done and she got up with 2 extra diyas in her hands to find the perfect spot for them walking amidst all the lit diyas not realizing that he was walking behind her holding the long end of her uneven dupatta.

Wishing you all a very Happy Diwali !!

Big Sur

2011-10-09T00:10:00.000-07:00

Whenever I visit any new place, I always feel I was destined to see it. Somehow. But I always feel so. Like for example, growing up, the only things I associated with SFO was the city of Golden Gate. And until very late, never knew that Golden gate is infact a bridge. So when I actually came to CA and visited the Golden gate bridge, for the first time and then many times to follow, I realized that, you are somewhere meant to see a place. Maktub maybe. Like every person you meet in life, you meet for a reason.

On the other hand, you get attached to a place. You fall in love with some place almost instantly. For the beauty of it, for the look and feel or the way you spend your time while at that place. And unknowingly you get emotionally attached to a place.

When you read about a place you just know where they lie on the map but after seeing it when you take a moment, close your eyes and think of it, you realize that every single place has been associated with a feeling inside of your head. Like now , when I close my eyes and think of Aurangabad , Hyderabad , Pune or Chicago , SFO , San Diego , Las Vegas , Seattle, Boston or Newyork I get one particular flash of picture in front of me. Does it happen to you?

Okay, philosophy apart, I thought of starting the picture post of the places I have been to so far. What I liked about it and what memories I carry from there.

Hope you guys like it.

I am going to start with Big Sur. It’s a place I have been to at least 5 times so far and absolutely love it. It has and will always have a special place in my heart. It’s a wonderful getaway for those who love the beaches and also for those who love the mountains. The splendid view of the cascades rising from the ocean is breathtaking. Its ideal for a long drive if that’s all you want. Or for camping near a campsite either overlooking the ocean or in the dark woods besides the Big Sur River. Hiking, whale watching, biking are some of the activities you can engage yourself in. That’s just few aspects of it.

But in spite of all these activities going around, it’s also an ideal place for a romantic getaway for those sweet nothings. You will find ample of options for resorts and spas without compromising the beauty of the place.

And that’s what I love about his place. You can choose to be in all the hustle and bustle but at the same get all the solitude you need, if that’s what you want. This place has an amazing calming effect. Go for it, if you are looking for a stress free, relaxing weekend / vacation!

How to get there: It’s about 150 Miles down south of San Francisco (US 101 Hwy) – an absolutely scenic drive.

Bridge on 101

This is Pfieffer Beach

Sunset captured through it

This is the famous 17 Mile Monterey Drive

Happy Monday !!

2011-09-19T11:21:00.000-07:00

We had Family Day celebrations at work last Friday. So the Friday evening was spent in the office premises – that was completely changed for the celebration. Small stalls of games, rides, slide for the kids and a lot of counters for the food and snacks.

From there we headed to the Olive Garden – for the first time ever. Yes, unbelievable but true. Almost 3 and a half years in US and I had never been to one before.

Well, not anymore. Though I liked their Bruscheta and the soup and breads, I would not say I loved it to the core. Or that it was extraordinary.

We had ordered some Lasagna for the main course. And though it was good, but was full of cheese. And I really cannot afford to take in that much of calories. Sigh :(

But of all that we ordered, what I absolutely loved was the Tiramisu Cake J . Yes yes - Calories again !! But they are all worth it for a bite of Tiramisu.

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M wanted to buy some books so we spent some time in the Barnes and Nobles Saturday night.

I got hold of as many books as I could carry, found a table and settled myself in. I was happy just with the touch and feel and smell of the books. As a child, I hated to read. I preferred playing outdoor games or drawing (sketching, painting) over reading. My favorites were Champak, Chacha Choudhary, TinTin or Pinky. I am not kidding. I really hated to read Reader’s Digest or big thick books. This was true for me and K3.

But K1 somehow loved to read. And she always had those big and boring books in her tow – all the time. Thankfully, things changed growing up. And now, not only can I survive through a book but I can infact enjoy it :)

Anyway, now that I love reading, let me just make up for all the years I lost hating it.

Currently I am reading Interpreter of Maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri (had read it long back) and Twilight by Stephanie Meyer.

How was your weekend?

And what are you guys currently reading?

Snapshot of our vacation , literally !!

2011-09-12T22:43:00.000-07:00

Still not out of my Vacation mode , I am dedicating this post to the sporadic pictures of the trip. After all , a picture is worth a thousand words !

The view near Hoover Dam - our first stop.

The picture says it all :)

The bridge joining the two states - Arizona and Nevada.

The Hoover Dam :

A closer look :

The clear skies on our way to The Grand Canyon. You can see the Mohave Desert / Forest on either side :

In the Canyon - very close to the Colorado River. They say touching the River brings in the good luck :)

The mighty muddy River says it all. The story of the Grand Canyon.

The Sky Walk :)

The Eagle Point :

Guano Point - My favorite View.

The Sun and Shadow play hide and seek creating the wonderful colors.

Las Vegas - First Look !

The city view from the Stratosphere Observatory.

You can see the "Strip" Street. Well , it doesn't look that glamorous in the day , I know !!

We had a wonderful trip. Hope you like the pics :)

Stratosphere

2011-09-09T21:03:00.000-07:00

Yes, I am a certified insane now !! Last time, when we visited Stratosphere, Vegas, I took the Big Shot and the X-scream ride. (Well, I still believe that X-scream is one of the scariest rides I have ever been on so far). Since M loves all the roller coaster and adventure rides and I don’t want him to be alone on them...I invariably get on them. To begin with, I used to be very very scared. Sometimes the nausea and sometimes the fear – of course what if something goes wrong.

The reason for not taking insanity then was only because it was closed which made me think, doubt all the more about that ride.

But this around, the ride was open, working and I saw many kids taking that too. So I was all geared up.

Me along with M, AB and AG all dared and got into it. We did it successfully while K3 was recording us and K1 with her hands on her ears, trying to watch us. So they get the bravery award for seeing us take it and of course we become the “certified insane “lot.

Wiki information about Insanity Ride and other Rides on Stratosphere (which mind you, we have already taken except the Sky Jump):

Big Shot at 1,081 ft (329 m) is the highest thrill ride in the world.
Insanity, opened in 2005, at 900 ft (270 m) is the second highest thrill ride in the world; it dangles riders over the edge of the tower and then spins in a circular pattern at approximately forty miles per hour
Sky Jump Las Vegas, a controlled descent, Bungee jumping-like ride that will allow riders to plummet 855 ft (261 m) attached to a high speed, descent wire.^[6] Sky Jump opened on April 20, 2010.
X-Scream at 866 ft (264 m) is the third highest thrill ride in the world

Watch out for the video here:

The Video is taken by K3 (Queenie as we all know her :) )

When your neck / back / ankle pains

2011-09-07T22:38:00.000-07:00

When do you know that you have become the perfect example of staying alone independently ?

- When you can very tactfully swoosh the big flying cockroach away from a wall in your apartment .. Trust me ..it wasn’t that easy.

Sorry I digressed.

Well .. I am back after a short break from the blogoshere :)

Reason for the break ? Well –Did you ever suffer from a neck sprain ? What about back pain ? How about a pain in the ankle and toe ? Now add that all together – that’s what had happened L unfortunately to me. I was pretty sure that I might have broken something up – inside of me – bones / discs I mean !

A couple of sittings with a chiropractor and a Docs appointment resolved my queries though. Its due to excessive computer usage – well in obviously a not so good posture.

The lessons learnt for the entire experience :

1. Take breaks often if you are on your computer / laptop all the time.

2. Stretch regularly.

And most importantly -

3. Don’t draw conclusions after searching for symptoms on the internet.

I know they all sound quite obvious but we do tend to ignore them.

Also, here are few easy tips to know how you have / don’t have the following ( as per my doc)

1. Cervical spondylosis : Rotate your neck from left to right (and the other way round) and if you feel as if some current is passing down your arm – you should definitely see a doc as it might be one of the very strong symptoms.

2. Lumbar spondylosis / Herniated disc : Lie down flat on your back. Swing one leg up in the air slowly. If this motion causes an excruciating pain in the back –know that there is something you need to worry about.

3. plantar fasciitis: When you get up in the morning and feel immense pain in the heel when you put down your feet on the floor. The pain is too bad and you cannot really walk but subsides as you keep on walking as the day progresses then buckle up for the ankle exercises.

4. Sciatica : If you have unbearable pain / pinching point in your buttocks and can feel the current / tickling sensation passing down your feet , you should go and get it checked.

Some minor lifestyle alterations should go a long way.

These are just the quick points for reference. You should anyway always see a doctor and not delay if you are in any sort of pain or discomfort which is unusual or unbearable.

As they say, prevention is always better than cure.

Stay healthy, Stay happy.

Blame it on my Masters !!!

2011-08-26T10:41:00.000-07:00

What does studying in the US (especially MS) does to you –

I stopped drinking tea after coming to the US after first 15 days or so. Reason – Who would get up , make the tea and then wash the utensil ? And then the cup? Isnt drinking coffee or milk much less painful ? So goes tea out of the routine and in comes coffee (very bad for health I know, and now I have stopped drinking it ) and Bournvita. Pour the milk in the cup, Keep the cup in the Microwave . Done ! Afterwork –Just wash the cup. Or which you need not until next day morning. *wink*

Well , now after being married for about year and a half .. (yes though me and M meet only on the weekends)and one more heads up - M really needs his tea. Our usual Saturday morning conversation would be :

Me : Do you need tea really ? ..(still in the bed )

M : yes ..!!

Me : Cant you make it this time ? (As if I make it everytime)

M : I have to make it daily when I am staying alone on the weekdays (emotional blackmail) ..

Me : (I really don’t buy that ) Ok fine. But you have to make it next time and tomorrow !!

After about 10 minutes :

M: Are you still sleeping ?

Me : Do you really need tea ?? …

Height of Laziness … ??? I know :)

From 2009 !!

2011-08-24T21:11:00.000-07:00

The month is close to getting over and I have barely posted just half of what I promised. Irrespective of that I am still going to try making another resolution next month :)

Since this week , we all celebrated Krishna Janmashtami , I am posting this painting of Lord Sri Krishna which I did somewhere in the April of 2009.

Its water colors on the medium-thick French-made Paper. Sorry for the not so clear picture as its taken from my Iphone.

Beyond Time !!

2011-08-23T10:13:00.000-07:00

You meet people in every walk of life, at every turn, diversion and exit but out of all of those, just few remain with you no matter what how and where. F.R.I.E.N.D.S. They share joys, sorrows, success and failures – in a way they become a part of your journey of life and unknowingly a part of you – your quintessential existence. And the best part is, unlike family, they are strangers when you meet them for the first time. But you know what, when I first met S, I always knew we would hit it off. His eyes though very naughty gave me that comfort – well, in the most embarrassing and uncomfortable first interaction. Sudhish and his group were ragging me and a friend of mine. No, we weren’t juniors (and that’s why the word “embarrassing”) we had just joined the class in the second year from Electrical to EXTC.

But, with A..Though we knew each other through common friends, it took us a while to actually get started. But anyway, it was meant to be.

I don’t really remember when did we , AKS, become the kind of friends that we are today. Maybe the Bharat Darshan (where I was playing a tourist and Ashish a RishiMuni) or Insearch (when me and Sudhish compered the event) or the two-wheeler race we had once (I was wearing a saree). Or maybe it was the phone calls. The endless and meaningless conversations over the landlines (we dint have cell phones back then). Somewhere between the studying for the exams (over phone, mind you (I remember once A help me reproduce one very complicated circuit diagram over phone since I dint have that book)) or helping figure out the syllabus to study, or writing those record books for each other (I wrote one entire course’s record book for S, with index), helping out in the practical exams (A would help with the procedure and I would mug up all the observation tables… God, we were crazy then).

May be it was all of that. But luckily, it dint end with college.

Helping each other finding jobs, celebrating the success, caring –sharing and worrying for each other, being possessive, we did start growing up together – unknowingly. We learnt sharing the silences. Understanding without words. Accepted each other with all the flaws. We have seen our most beautiful side and the ugliest side without being judgmental. A one point, A and S created a fictitious situation and discussed how I would react to it..And they experimented that on me and I behaved exactly the way they thought I would.

We once made a pact, sitting on a bus stop – that we will, no matter what end up settling in the same city – and we all did sign it.

I remember once S asking me the question “Where do you see yourself 10 years from now? “ And we had discussed it at length without being aware of even how long or fast these years go. I don’t remember the answer honestly. And I don’t care anymore even if I am not even close to what I thought I would want to become. But I do know that it’s been 10 years now. A decade!! And we are all together. And at a happy place.

And from the gawky, awkward, confused, directionless but full of enthusiasm, curiosity, full of life 20s, we are now transitioning to the 30s..Well, all of that but in a toned down version still holds true but, but it’s just that we are a lot more comfortable in our own skin today.

We have all got wonderful life partners now who are generous and huge – hearted enough to understand this bond. Yes, we have had our share of misunderstandings, hurt feelings, questions and complaints – but we have grown out of it beautifully knowing and understanding each other better.

Sudhish turned 30 today. And whenever he celebrates his birthday, he very cleverly induces his age on to and into us. So, I always live a life a year older than what I am – always. So, in a way, we all somewhere turned 30 this week. These 10 years were legen.. Wait a minute..dary !!

And here’s to the coming decade!!!!

Dear S,

Wishing you a very Happy Birthday!!

3 things I wish for you:

Wishing you a lovely life with your lovely wife / all the professional success which you absolutely deserve / and a lifetime of Salsa :)

Bonus Wish – You come out with your “Joshi-Nair” book :)

3 things which I absolutely adore / admire about you : Your crystal clear heart and straight forwardness , your temper (I don’t remember having a single fight with you in the last 10 years ) – disagreements yes , but fights – never ! , the brightness and happiness in your eyes when you dance J

3 things I am thankful for –

The cake and the teddy on my otherwise boring and sad 25^th Birthday / for all the support , encouragement and confidence that you gave me (be it for compering / dancing / learning how to take the escalator or my visa interview / wedding .

A small milestone

2011-08-17T21:32:00.000-07:00

One year went by, just like that! Of innumerable days and uncountable memories. Some significant, others not so much. You make resolutions of which, again you meet some and wish had not made the others. Well, the point is, you do remember certain days and dates sometimes the significant ones and sometimes the not so significant ones too. I completed one year of work after my Masters this 9^th of August.

I remember this day last year so vividly. Saying bye to M was so tough that I cannot even start to explain. So during this entire year , I got a job , moved to San Diego , changed 3 apartments , made friends, worked on 3 projects , took almost 70 flights (I counted them yesterday) , went to India for K3’s wedding (nopes, this number is not included in that ‘70’), travelled back on OPT (the worst 26 hours of my life ever – well almost !) , M’s parents were here with us for few months so travelled around with them to different places (like Lake Tahoe , SFO , LA , San Diego , Orange County, Seattle , Half Moon Bay etc…. ) .Travelled to Boston and Newyork for K3’s Graduation ceremony. Took another job, moved to a new place. Stayed there for a couple of months, moved to another apartment in the same city. Got a car, learnt how to drive on my own (as in sitting all alone in the car).

All this happened in one year. No, it dint just fly by. It was way too hectic. This year, I actually plan to concentrate on my work. Sleep more, worry less, read and write more, travel less too – yes, I definitely need a break from that.

As a child, I always wanted to grow up to be independent enough to have the freedom of making my own decisions. Little did I know then that with it, comes the responsibility of owing it up. No matter what the outcome is. Yes, after growing up, I wish, I so much wish at times, that why can’t somebody really decide things for us and own them too. When I took the decision of joining this job, I badly wanted a job. So any job, anywhere on the planet would have sufficed. Probably after that, I have asked this question to M every time before saying a bye, catching that darn flight, whether it was a right decision or not. He always smiles and owns up for it.

Of His and Her:7

2011-08-08T21:56:00.000-07:00

Coming to the locked door from work was what she always hated. But no, this wasn’t at all what she was sad about today.

It was almost close to a week that both of them had not talked to each other. Entering her rented apartment, she thought maybe this time it was over forever. They had broken up so many times so far that she had even lost the count. But they would soon be back together after an hour or a movie or a weekend’s break. But not this time. She opened the patio drapes and allowed the golden – orange setting sun colors come in. She missed all the evenings which they had spent watching the sun set over a cup of coffee and conversations. But, there was something about the setting sun she did not like. It always made her heart sink. She loved to see the rising sun though. He would snap back saying “what’s the difference –the colors are still the same?

That’s what their problem was. They had very few similarities and hated each other’s differences. She wondered how they could even get together at first place.

Sipping her coffee all alone she was even more determined not be the one to say a sorry first this time which she always did. She didn’t want to take the sole ownership or burden ,so to say , of their relationship. It was his responsibility too. Because lately she had begun to feel that she was imposing herself on him.

“You are too young to decide what you want in life. Make mistakes, get over and move on “was what others had advised her to do. And she concurred. They spent most of their time arguing with each other or proving each other wrong. It was all very complicated. Very entangled. They were too involved, too possessive, and too jealous all at the same time. The new city and the new jobs added to the pressure. College was much fun.

Coming back to present, she realized that this time their relationship was over. It was her who had suggested the breakup for all the obvious reasons. But in reality, it was very tough. Maybe just because she was too used to him. But all said and done, her every single day spent without talking to him made her feel hollower inside.

She knew it was too late to call him up and say a sorry like all other times … it was almost a week. And then her resolution! She wondered why could not she have a beautiful –touchwood relationship with him like all others.

She heard the birds chirping and realized that it was close to getting dark. She better get up and prepare her dinner. She slept thinking, worrying and crying all alone with wet cheeks on a moist pillow.

Next day morning-

She opened the door even before the sunrise to Him, who was impatiently ringing the bell.

Her: “Who’s this? “without opening the door.

Him: “Who else would it be? “

Her: “What are you doing here this early?” with the door still closed adding “and btw if you do not remember, we have broken up “

Him: “Do you want me to take it seriously? And do you think I would? “

Her: “Then what took you so long? “

Him: “Will you please open the door first. “

And then she finally opened the door and saw him after a week. Her eyes filled with tears seeing His warm, comforting face. And she felt a lot better just seeing him.

Without wasting another moment, he quickly started the conversation “Look at you, you are a mess without me. I was waiting for you to say sorry …!! But now I know, it’s not only about the sunsets... it’s about the sunrises too. And I don’t want to miss today’s …!”

She was stumped to hear this from him and smiled back knowing that they were going to have a lot more breakups in the years to come!!!

August

2011-08-03T20:41:00.000-07:00

August is here :) not that I was waiting for it. But, yes, there is a goal for this month. I am aiming for 10 posts this month. Let’s see how it goes. Easy right? But not anymore since whatever free time I get, I am spending it with my new found love – Kindle :) . Reading Little Women after about 15 years. And loving it.

Anyway, so looks like my weight is kind of stuck at one point and I really need some more motivation to go about it now. So anyone wants to rub theirs on to me? Today was my first day in the gym. Like mentioned before I was jogging on the trail. But now I need some change from that routine so enter “GYM”. A little background here – I was never very comfortable working out at the gym. Do feel conscious maybe. But it turns out that I am not the only one. So I have got this motivation from M ad AB to work out in a gym and my initial discomfort should go within a week. Let’s see. Will keep you updated on it. And if I do this regularly for the rest of August, I am going to treat myself with a beautiful dress :) !!

So, I have already made two resolutions for this month. Do you want to join me and make some?

On a side note, thanks for your response and feedback for my previous post “Beyond Distance”.

Beyond Distance !!

2011-07-27T21:33:00.000-07:00

Back in 2004 – I had enrolled myself for a Post Graduate Certificate Program from the Pune University. After our first class of Digital Design was over everybody left the classroom hurriedly except me and her. We both continued working on a problem although separately , sitting on different benches. After about 15- 20 minutes, we exchanged a “Hello” and that’s how our conversation started – about analyzing and solving the problem. And that’s how it all started. Our Friendship I mean. From that day we started studying together which involved Solving our assignments, studying for the examinations etc. We were sincere, hardworking and determined. I was then staying as a PG and she was staying with her relatives.

We usually met at Pataleshwar or Chatushringi and studied for hours together. On weekends, our study day started at around 7:30 am in the mornings and we would study until sunset. No gossips, no un-necessary talks. Purely studies. I remember discussing complex concepts of Advanced Digital Subsystem Design / VLSI fundamentals and VHDL / Verilog code snippets with her.

Eventually we both did well in the exams and co-incidentally found jobs in the same company within the same team. And probably that’s when we actually started to bond beyond studies. We shared an apartment. She taught me many things and helped me become a better person, honestly. She ingrained in me the quality of cleanliness – trust me.. ! Every Friday we cleaned our apartment by sweeping and wiping the floors/ arranging the piles of clothes neatly / cleaning the kitchen / washrooms. I used to tell her every Friday – that it’s Friday and we should instead be watching a movie or dine out but no we had to clean the apartment on Fridays. I started maintaining a diary writing in every detail of expenses I made which again I learnt from her. Now don’t get me wrong. My parents had taught me all of that. But I was just too lazy and used to do it as a task because I have been instructed to do that and not willingly. She forced me to wake up early and accompany her for morning walks and watching sunrises. Every night I slept promising her that I would and then every morning would wake up to be the crankiest person and come up with different reasons for not getting up. But she won’t buy any of that and drag me literally out of bed.

At work, we had cubes right besides each other. We learnt the same things at work / had more or less similar assignments and would discuss it back home until midnight. Our Manager started calling us “Changu-Mangu” . I remember M telling me once then – “You know, you and her fall in Varan Bhaat category”. (So there are apparently three categories- Pizza / Pavbhaaji and Sadha varan Bhaat i.e plain Dal and Rice) Yes, and it was true indeed. Eventually S (her hubby) told her “You know what – you and K fall in BaavLat category” (Apparently anybody can fool you category) which also was sadly true. We took Rangoli , yoga and Naturopathy classes together. We also tried taking an unsuccessful Beautician class.

Anyway, with time gradually we started discussing about books / philosophy / yoga and Life! And each one of us started having an enormous amount of influence on the other in every aspect unknowingly. We became each other’s dumping bags (no –not punching bags!). Like venting out our worries / fears / problems / concerns / negativities – and the other would provide an unwavering support , patient ear and comfort no matter what. We were there for each other either mending the broken hearts or spirits.

Time flew. Circumstances changed. The journey continued. Studies brought me here and I left my job. With our busy schedules we did manage to update each other through emails and phone calls. I got her emails before my exams wishing me good luck and I talked to her in all her sleepless nights when she was expecting.

Be it the precious moments of getting married / buying homes / having babies (she has one now  ) we made sure that the other is a part of the process.

She was with me holding my hand (literally) on the toughest day of my life – sharing the silence and the pain. Yesterday, I got an email from her. She had lost someone close – very close to her. I felt bad that I couldn’t be with her physically at this point in life. All I was going to do was offer my condolences over phone. For which I had no words. With shivering hands , watery eyes and a very heavy heart I did manage to call her. And we talked. Knowing that I was struggling for words she did all the talking – answering all my unasked questions , assuring me that she was doing much better now after 15 days.Pouring her heart out . And making me realize that between friends distance doesn’t really matter . What matters is being there !!!

PS : I have disabled comments for this post.

Random Post

2011-07-17T21:51:00.000-07:00

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ZNMD – I had not liked the promos at all for some reason. They felt too clichéd. But since M wanted to see it , I went with it. And oh my ! The movie took me by surprise. It’s a wonderful feel good movie. About celebrating life. Liked a Hindi movie after a long time.

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HP7-2 – I wanted to see this no matter what. First for the fact that it’s the last of the Harry Potter  Sigh !! And second ofcourse because I am a fan  And as expected loved the movie. And got this urge to re-read the entire series.

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Which I will once our Kindle arrives. Yayy !! We finally ordered one :D

*******
Spent a lovely Saturday with friends from San Diego. They drove to our place. Nothing like a group of girls talking about just everything they could – from movies , shopping , discount in Macy’s, parlor , skin treatments ,food, weight, to relationships, jobs , careers , life , dreams. And these are the people whom I dint even know last year about this time. Strange , isn’t it ?

Of Weighty Issues ...

2011-07-13T21:38:00.000-07:00

Weight had never been an issue or concern for the first 24 years of my life. Almost never. Until then, the lack of it surely was one!

This is my third time on being a “weight loss regimen” so far. Purely self-driven and something which has nothing to do with any crash diets or expert advice whatsoever.

Mind you , am not a complete “ overweight case” yet so please don’t imagine me as a 200 pounds lady with a bowl popcorn in one hand and coke in another. Sorry folks ! Right now , I weigh about 115 pounds and need to lose about 5 pounds to look good and fit for my height of about 5 feet and 2 n a half inches. (Yes , I do add that half inch – it matters to me :) )

The first time I ever put on the weight was when I got my first job after looking for one for the longest time you can ever imagine of. So with the relaxed state of mind , the body probably indulged in to :) . To add to it , we had a “Sweets Corner” right besides our Office Building. Well , by the time the panic button was “ON” , I had already put on a sizable amount of weight. But losing weight then was easy you see. With age being one factor , the metabolism rate was still good. And yes , Maa ke haath ka fresh khaana being the other one. So just cutting on those extra sweets and samosas was good enough. All I did was went to 3 trekking trips with my friends (Lohagad , Sinhagad and Matheran – for all the curious minds) within a span of about 3 months which actually did the trick. I lost all the gained weight happily. Happily because , weight loss was never “always” on my mind and with trips being so much fun accompanied by a bunch of good friends , weight loss came naturally as a byproduct.

So , I was a happy and healthy 100 pounds when I first landed to the US of A in 2008. During his trip to Chi town, M bought me a big bag full of chocolates and that’s how I got addicted to them leading to my second story. Munching them during classes, in lab, while studying in library – dint realize when winter and the first semester was already over. My friends used to envy my genes and I would smile back proudly completely forgetting my previous encounter with weight gain. With the super busy schedule, I actually did not realize when I had put on a nice layer of fat under those big sweaters and snow jackets. Sigh!!

So the panic button was “ON” yet again. All the chocolates in the Kitchen shelf were replaced by different flavors of Green Tea. And the entire “vetty” summer (Tamil term – for “khaali junta” as in “jobless people”) was spent in rigorous workouts. Yes, everything. From yoga to jogging to Biking. Bad part was the body was not responding to all of that as quickly as the first time. But the good part was I had a good, dedicated and always motivated team of girls (my roomies) who were also working hard to lose weight. I remember jogging / walking for 5 miles a day at one point. We were crazy then. But amidst all the “No luck” , “Nopes”, “not yet” reactions after spending hours of time in front of mirror …one fine day , I miraculously got into my “benchmark” jeans and Eureka – I had done that. Everybody around me suddenly seemed to realize it and in came the compliments and questions seeking advice.

Two years later – which is NOW :

After all those efforts, who on earth would be careless and lazy enough to put on all of that lost weight plus some more as a bonus? Yes I agree. But unfortunately, I could. And I did put on all of that weight. With wedding, job search and status issue worries weight kind of became a non-issue. Somehow.

So, here I am, yet again with the panic button “ON” promising myself that if this time I lose that weight, I will never again let it grow on me – literally.

But this time – the challenge is bigger. With metabolism rate much slower, nobody to accompany for jogs on daily basis, I need a lot higher motivation levels.

So where am I? This is the fifth week of my exercise and monitoring my food intake, I do feel fitter and fresher than what I was before 5 weeks. Am not yet sure whether I have lost any weight or not. But let’s see. Nopes –that benchmark jeans is still a zillion fat layers away. :)

What’s my routine? – Well 3 miles of jogging about 3 to 4 times a week along with 2 days of yoga !!! As I had promised here , this post is an update. And now I need your comments for the motivation :)

And here are the pics of my Jogging Track for you :)

Catalina !!!

2011-07-06T22:23:00.003-07:00

After a long time, Me and M finally took out a day together to the Catalina Islands. We always wanted to go there but because of our different geographical locations , we dint want to spend time in additional travelling. Well , blame our enthusiasm levels too.

So , this long weekend we finally boarded on to the ferry to the beautiful Catalina Islands. Honestly , I had imagined the beaches to be magnificent and huge like never seen before. Nevertheless, I was disappointed in that regard. But the disappointmene ended just there.

It’s a very small island but has a feeling of comfort and warmth to it. It boasts of a very good weather all through the year. And it was indeed very pleasant. The setting of the entire place was very bohemian. The people were much laid back and easy going. Nobody was in any sorts of hurry (except yours truly who was paranoid about almost everything –yes even on a vacation! Example? Getting hyper in the queue for getting the perfect seats on the ferry , for all the rides and activities we did etc) People came up proactively and asked if they could take pictures of us whenever they saw us clicking each other. Sweet !

So , as planned , we got up very early and took the first ferry toward the island (Avalon). Reached in about an hour. This journey was quite uneventful , thankfully, unlike I had imagined. No matter how “not a morning person you are” , the experience of witnessing the darkness of night vanish into the first morning sunrays is always refreshing – a coffee helps too :p .

The first thing we did after landing was took a quick stroll to realize that the island was still waking up. The shopkeepers – all along the ocean side , were cleaning , wiping and waiting for the day’s madness to kick in. We chose a small café at the corner to grab our breakfast. Being a vegetarian I was kind of worried that I might not get anything to eat or could not survive the smell of the sea food – but to my surprise nothing of that sorts happened. We got a sumptuous breakfast that consisted of mashed potatoes , French Toast and freshly squeezed Orange Juice. Sitting there waiting for our order in itself was so relaxing , somehow. And I could already get a feeling that yes , we were on a far far land – away from all the worldly insanity.

After another walk , surprisingly we both agreed upon what activities to choose from all the available options. The first thing we chose was “Parasailing”. Since it was just 9 am , we dint have to wait for our turn and got the first ride. Well, with M , I had been on a lot of roller coaster and the scary rides before so I wasn’t in particular scared until ofcourse we were hooked to the bar – pushed – away from the boat at the mercy of the parachute and the guy who operated it. All of you who aren’t scared of heights or water should definitely try this once . Heck! You should try it otherwise too. It’s a very calming activity. You go up slowly and come down again equally slowly. And all the time that you are in the air – you can feel the fresh , cool breeze and enjoy a breathtaking view only ofcourse if you keep your eyes open. Theres nothing between you and the air outside. It’s a feeling as if you have gotten wings for a while or like you are on one of those very high swings in your backyard. It was a very soothing activity. Okay all said and done , there was a point where I was scared and had some negative thoughts peeped in as in “what ifs.. “ But then whats the fun without that tiny adrenaline rush right ?And after you come down that’s certainly not what you are going to take with you for the rest of your life.

When you are on the Island you cannot rent any cars or other vehicles except a Golf Gart and drive through the island. We rented one for an hour. The guy handed us a map of what all places to cover in that one hour , where not go and what not to do. Keeping in mind all of that , we headed for a ride on the island. The map was very confusing and we could see everyone with a question mark on their faces looking for the right direction. Since the time was very limted – just one hour – the entire ride kind of became a thrill ride and it was like playing a game of treasure hunt. If you ever happen to visit this place , make sure you rent the it at least for an hour. You can get to see all the interiors of the island and a panoramic ocean view.

We took a break for lunch – had already walked the beach side 2- 3 times. For such a small place tgere are a lot of food options. You can find everything – from sea food to Italian , Mexican , American etc. We chose an Italian Pizzeria and went for a classic Penne Pasta with Garlic Bread.

We also experienced an unsuccessful attempt of snorkeling (M enjoyed it though) – darn , it required swimming ! Since we were too tired, we decided to get on an earlier ferry than we had planned .

Watching the kids play in the sand and water , lazing around on the beach - with or without a book , just sitting together and watching the sea waves , walking around with no particular agenda in mind – was so refreshing than checking the emails every 10-15 min or that Facebook update or browsing your iphone for that matter. You realize that the day has indeed enough hours for us to do so many things. Waiting in the queue for 10 -15 min with sleepy eyes and tired body we took the next ferry and a lot of memories back home.

Here are some random pics for you ->

Brow woe !

2011-06-30T20:39:00.001-07:00

Disclaimer – It’s a very girly post !! Guys – read at your own risk.

During Engineering years , I found every other girl surrounding me getting their eyebrows done. I would not really comprehend as to why would it be so necessary for somebody who has about 40 courses , 20 or so practical exams and god knows how many submissions and vivas to worry about. But no , in spite of of all these , they would really get bothered by that one hair out of sync with the rest of the brow line and spend hours in front of the mirror plucking it. Ofcourse it would not bother me since I had my nose and head dug deep into my record books.

Man – such a waste of time and money and why ? For all the pain !!

Honestly , my Dad was strangely against it. He would reason it saying that it gives your face an artificial look.

Anyway .. years ..and mind you many of them passed by. And here I was still in a pickle – to do or not to do. For my wedding , inspite of the beautician’s fervent requests and orders , I dint succumb to it. And “ said I-do” without doing the eyebrows.

So , are we still discussing it ? Unfortunately yes. Now that I have a job (finally my studies are over) , I kind of had a lot of time at hand and ofcourse with the car one day I thought of accompanying my friend to the beauty parlor here (Indian). And with a lot of hesitation finally got my eyebrows done.

Was it painful ?- Yes. Bearable ? – Yes. Worth it ? Donno. Coz I do not look miraculously beautiful or different – any other person might not even notice it.

Well so my dear readers – if one of you is in the same dilemma – then my suggestion would be –

If you want to get them done , just go ahead and do it – its not that big a deal (no – not life changing at all) and for those of you who do not want to get them done – well then don’t as its really not that big a deal :)

P.S : By the way , this is 50 th post on the "Big Picture" !! Yayyy !!

Hi Me , its Me !!

2011-06-27T20:02:00.002-07:00

Growing up with two sisters of more or less my age and a bunch of cousins , and then a lovely set of friends , I was never really alone even for a moment. Meaning , be it a moment of fear / panic or excitement , or that cup of tea , be it travelling , studying , watching TV I was always with people around me. Be it exams or birthdays , submissions or festivals , breakfast or dinner. Either with somebody actually or if not then atleast over phone. It was only after I came to the US , that I came across those days when once in a while I got a lot of opportunities of solitude – or just being with self so to say. But given the fact that I shared my room / apartment with 7 or 4 other girls , even that occurrence must have been rather rare.

Well , my point is until now , I never knew how it was to spend the time all by yourself. But now , after moving to Irvine , I am experiencing that quite often infact most of the times. I wonder when we are with someone , we always tend to entertain people around us , have some POV over something or the other. Now that I am left woth a lot of time with self , I have realized , I do am a different person with people being around – not that I pretend to be good always –and you all know that J since most of the times I am not.. but I am for sure a different flavor. And honestly , even though at times when always around people , you crave for that moment of solitude for whatever it is , its actually good only until you get it.

Meaning how would you talk to yourself the entire day ? Or how would you tell a joke to you ? Or how would you fight with you ? I know there are hundreds of other things that you can do – read / write / watch / paint / sing / cook / exercise etc…. but I guess nothing beats talking your heart out.

The reason that I am finding it rather difficult could be since I am so used to sharing my room / staying with a bunch of girls that I have kind of become addicted to the long – absolute non-sense girls talk. :P

Anyway , for all of you who had a mind of their own from a very early stage in life would not really understand what I am trying to say here. So , well this past couple of months were spent with most of time with ofcourse me – learning to do a lot of things alone. From driving , to having lunch in the office, grocery shopping , exercise , cooking everything by myself – I have learnt to keep myself engaged enough that I am not left with much time to have this whole realization of living alone anymore.

After a lot of effort when I thought I can be alone and njoy my own company one beautiful morning I opened the patio drapes for fresh air while having the hot tea is when I saw a pristine yellow rose burgeoning slowly – in my very own patio. I dint know it existed until then. And all this while I was thinking I was alone. Coming to think of it , there is always life in everything around you , you just have to have enough awareness to acknowledge their existence and be patient enough for it to bloom :) ..

Here are the pictures for you :)

Edited to add : I have a roomie now - and things are back to normal :)

All those who wander arent always lost !!!

2011-04-15T23:59:00.002-07:00

A lazy day in a scorching summer once used to be - about eating countless mangoes , about lying on the bare floor to beat the heat and chit- chat for hours together – those sweet nothings !waiting for the “Geeta” ice- cream (for some reason , we used to call it ice-croat ) , plucking the chameli / aboli / paarijaat flowers and discuss the art of making gajras .. , dream of the combination and colors of the bangles you would pick next time the churi-wala comes .. ,oiling the hair and braiding them , waiting for Amma to finish her puja and apply the turmeric – sandal paste on our foreheads , waiting for the entire week for the Ramayana / Mahabharata episodes on the Television – DD :) ..

There never was a hint of boredom even in the exact sameness of every single day – we were never short of enthusiasm / excitement / fun / creativity – such was the life !!

But this life had a sense of satisfaction – yes at that age I could feel it. No complaints , no expectations , no negativity. No fear , no boredom. There were problems – one of the major being no electricity for 12 hours a day – very famously known as load shedding – but for 12 hours – either day or night ! But that never was a problem – we had other thousand things to do – well more or less the ones that I mentioned above and in one of my previous posts “Rewind" ..

And back to" now " – life has changed diagonally . The hectic routine , living alone , changing jobs, changing places – “I just don’t change my wardrobe anymore – I change my city altogether” is what I can say actually !! Where one goal is achieved by creating the next one – where one idle day would be considered as time killing – where doing nothing has started to leave me with a huge guilt. Surviving in the new place , new job , eternal immigration laws/ forms/ status worries , traveling on every single weekend . Being on the plane would inspire me once – now its started killing me – one emotion at a time.

But this is all we dream about , isn’t it. But the most funny thing about dreams is – you realize you don’t want it anymore / or want something else the moment you get it. I am not complaining – believe me - I am just asking – is this a good place to be at.

Where you just want to be with your family and friends , your loved ones – but all you can do is finding the right time to manage to talk to them.

Change is good but how much change can your brain take ? Cant you have atleast a single day where all you do is nothing !!

On the side note- I am doing good. This space is just pouring out the emotions , right ? And I am going to make this place more honest , more me , more what I think and feel and rather than worrying about who could be reading it ! And , I am on one of those planes – which make me all of this – so bear with it :) !!!

Edited to add : I had written all of the above crap last week – and this week I am on another plane. Nothing really happened between these two flights –so to say – but still a lot has changed.

I could get to see the most splendid view ever through my window enroute SFO – and yes , this certainly is the best place to live (don’t believe me , go ahead and Google it ) – and if I cannot be happy here , then I can never be happy anywhere.

Well , not just that , but a call to Mommy Dear is a solution to all problems – actual , created and fictitious :)

Good Bye SD

2011-03-04T11:19:00.000-08:00

Its the last working day at Qcom , San Diego.. a place I worked for over 6months now .. a city where I stayed in for over 6 months now.
But the memories - are so less..
I would still like to keep that distant day wd M and A from our one day trip to SD in 2008 .. and thats the SD for me forever.

Why ? Lack of time .. with lot of work , the constant shuttling and moving places after every 2 months to get away from not signing the year long lease - the time just flew.
Yes , as we grow up , thats what we say often :) Time flies.

And work wise - besides getting the glamour of the word QCom on my resume -everything else was mundane ..
Yes , I met a lot of new ppl , i did draw inspiration from a couple of them , and yes I did learn.
But the excitement was missing - the first job's first day excitement , the first job's last day emotions are all long gone ..
No no - I am not stuck in a certain time warp or a place .. I did njoy my RA ship first day , co-op last day .. but with every transition - it just becomes a routine - with no strings attached.

I got up today morning - and I felt nothing ! Yes , I did check last night if I actually have the offer that I have , that I already sent out my resignation - did all that.
But this morning was like all others ..only thing I dint have to catch a flight this friday !

I did my yoga - yes I did it too ! It was that normal. I am in my office right now - the window facing big office room ..and I dont know what to do. Dont feel like taking puctures ..or giving away the good bye goodies !

Have I done it so many times that I have just gotten brutally used to it ? or is it something that happens to everyone after a certain point ?
Whatever , for now I can just say - that I ..have become comfortably numb !!
yeah from the Pink Floyd. :)

Target

2011-02-16T10:36:00.000-08:00

3 Inches
4 Kgs
3 months

Are you with me ?
I am going to add a link here later - updating the progress and you can pour in your suggestions and questions :)

Maktub

2011-02-12T23:05:00.001-08:00

I just finished reading the Alchemist. The second time. And thank God I gave it another shot. Last time when I read it , it was a long 6 years back – when I thought I am all worldly and wise. Now I know , hardly did I understand the book then.

Back then , I felt it a complete waste of Santiago’s time in search of his treasure which he had finally to find where he started from and in the process mine .. waste of time I mean.

But today I am close to believing in the word “Maktub” … “its written” … You were meant to visit all the places you visited and are about to ..you somewhere already belonged to them …and the people ..you were destined to meet every single person u meet in life.

And that’s what makes the process – it was finding a treasure for Santiago , and leading the life for us… interesting !!

On the side note –Maktub doesn’t mean , you will get everything for free since its meant to be yours – no. It probably means that knowing its written , you should be able to be at peace with self in every moment of pain , fear , uncertainty and darkness. Because then you are aware that it is just a part of the process and well at the end it is all Maktub 

Just the words !!

2011-01-19T22:08:00.002-08:00

The dreams. The decisions. The dilemma. The mistakes. The hard work. The past. The fights. The tears. The laughters. The lost time and people. The ifs then and the buts now. The journeys. The places. The frustration. The past. The future. The endless worry. The compromises. The failures. The patience. The rat race. The life.

The hope !!!

Iphoned

2010-11-13T21:18:00.001-08:00

Life has changed in many ways .. so much that by the time I think of writing about it , boom – comes the other one. So before this life changing experience gets mundane , let me write about it.

Me and M (M&M) recently gifted each other with iP4 – 32 GB and got a supporting 2 Gig data plan !

Insider – Infact its M whos got it for both of us !!

Yours truly being technologically challenged and M being a gadget freak (may I say so) this was obviously his intiative. I was infact not supportive at all initially with the thought of the impending expenditure. Hardly did I know then that it will have such a huge impact on me !!!

But finally I gave in !

The first thing I noticed was its quite user friendly , since I could use it with no assistance at all from day one. App store has a lot of interesting applications and what made it more interesting was the deal Me n M made between us. The one who finds a new app will get the brownie points …:) And that got me hooked to it.

The FAcetime is awesome. M knows what I am wearing to office and I know what my sister cooked – handy , fast and interesting.

With the CallsUnltd app, you can configure your Vonage connection on iPhone, so that now I can call my mommie from SD using my landline connection in SF !! Whoopieee !!

Camera – The back side 5MB and the front VGA – makes life cooler and colorful. I can take a shot of what I am eating and whoa- How I am eating it !!! It helps me capture the sunset colors of SD very vividly on the way to airport and look I just emailed it to all.

I have my Bank app which hopefully will make banking easy , a southwest app – which makes me have a snapshot of all the upcoming iteneries, check in and see the flight status too.

Dhingana.com app has a very good Radio – I need not bother about downloading music (lil lazy here). M would vouch for Tandora though.

The other useful apps would be weather , navigator, around me, skype etc.

I have configured my gmail and Office Outlook , so I get easy acces to emails ( I know this isn’t something I need to brag about iPhone –for blackberry would do it much better. ) But I love the look of all that on iPhone.

The resolution in awesome. I like watching photos on it over my HP i5 laptop .. huh !

There are hazaar apps out of which one is a chumtracker – oops , I just said THAT !! Nevermind .. !

Ohh and yes, I already dropped it twice – so done with the stress testing too.

The cons - ? High chances of missing your bus stop because you would be busy exploring your iPhone and then getting down at a wrong bus-stop – but well yaa, nevamind – my iPhone will navigate me !!!

PS : I am on FB all the time now :D :D :D

This post is a proof that this url still belongs to me and I haven’t forgotten its passwd :D

Thanks for visiting …. !!!

M

2010-04-12T12:55:00.000-07:00

M is none other than my dear husband. He is an absolute sleep lover. He simply loves to sleep and yes he is a deep sleeper too, hardly taking 2 minutes to sleep off after lying on the bed. I was no different until we got married- and since he actually takes no time to sleep I have begun to feel that I am an insomniac.

Like the other day we saw a bunch of seals lazing around doing nothing on the floating wood planks at pier 39 , SFO , it was then I was wondering “what a pathetic life – doing nothing” to myself is when M exclaimed with complete enthusiasm – “look at them , what a life – doing nothing – I would love to be one of them !!!”

Or like the other time , once while sleeping , I mushily digged my nose onto his face struggling to sleep. M was obviously getting bothered since I was disturbing his much beloved sleep . After bearing that for a minute or two , he said

M : “You know what, if you want to continue sleeping like that, we might have to breathe in sync”

Me : “A what??? “

M : “I meant we need to either exhale at the same time or inhale together at the same time”

Me: “And why is that ?”

M: “If I exhale and you inhale, I don’t wanna you to take in all of the CO2 ….”

Now who would want to do that , I obviously turned around and M went back to sleep HAPPILY !!

While I am not writing....

2010-04-04T16:05:00.001-07:00

Happy Women's Day 2010 !!

2010-03-07T23:09:00.000-08:00

I found this quote in my diary. Thought it to be apt for the day.

"Because I am a woman, I must make unusual efforts to succeed.
If I fail , no one will say -'She doesnt have what it takes.'
They will say - ' Women dont have what it takes. ' "

~ Clare Boothe Luce.

Of His and Her:6

2010-03-01T14:07:00.000-08:00

“Will you marry me ?” He asked her. And She slapped him back. Her tiny nose became dark red and she left. They were in third grade. Until then he always thought that she was an angel – since he had never seen anybody with that fair skin and those big and beautiful glittering blue eyes. Eventually the so-thought love settled down to admiration and then a “Hi-Hello”. They became fierce competitors by the time they were in 6th grade. So much that they got the entire class divided in two – his side and her side – finger pointing, mud-flinching , backstabbing became a routine until one fine day.

While he was getting the homework notebooks from staffroom , he saw her sobbing. He never got to know the reason but his heart melted instantly. He felt his stomach churning. Her blue eyes shone when filled with tears. Somehow , they were not meant for those.

Seeing an appropriate time he told her that they make a “treaty” – a word that he had learned from History. A treaty that they will never fight again and be friends. She agreed.

And then it was never looking back. He helped her with Social and she helped him with Maths. They were together whenever they needed support , encouragement, advice, help , guidance- his cricket match, her drama competition, his first date, her engagement, his first love, her first job, his wedding , her twin babies.

“Take Care” and he kept the call. This was the best part about her he thought. He was talking to her after 6 months. Once It had been more than an year too. Time and space never changed the equation between them. He still doesn’t know why he never asked her out again ever. Her thought was always refreshing though , like a spring flower , like ponds lavender talcum powder. Some questions cannot be answered like some relations cannot be defined.

Like she doesn’t know why she still has , in her scrapbook, a worn out leaf- with the word “treaty” written on it.

About Me

2010-02-25T13:40:00.003-08:00

Today I come across “About me” tab almost everywhere – orkut, facebook, blog, twitter etc. And everytime I see it , I pause for a moment..( well the moment is big enough!)and think of what could I write in there. I am too aggressive about it probably…coz I always want to write something that aptly suits me in that limited space… something that defines me crisply!

I did think of few things!

Maybe I could write something about Gemini – my sunsign But honestly I don’t know whether I am a true Gemini or not. I still need to research a lot on “geminis” and can think of writing about it only after that.

I thought of my hobbies… Hmm maybe “I am too passionate about sketching/painting, yoga , reading, etc” Coming to think of it- yes I like sketching a lot but I can actually get time for it once in a blue moon.Literally.Like once in 3-4 years.And yoga? I do propagate yoga, and am an ardent follower of but that’s not something that I do religiously though I want to. Anyway!

And if you see, all those social websites already have a “Hobbies” section so anyway it would be redundant.

Borrowing some great person’s words sounded a good idea. After googling a lot about some perfect quote that could suit me , my temperament, my existence or whatever was a tough job. From then, I discarded the idea .Hoping to find some appropriate quote one day, I started considering the idea of writing my professional vitals!

Wow…that sounded glamorous but when I actually started writing , I felt like I am applying for some job !! no way could I keep it. Scratched !

Why is it that I find it so tough to write “About Me” ? I am with me since forever , I know how I react to things , how my approach towards things and people is, my likes , dislikes.Everything. Like I know I can remember every crap thing of who wore what shirt when (yes :( ) , all the insignificant details back in school too and don’t remember what I learnt in class last semester. That I have weird habbits - I always take off my glasses while eating-I feel they are too heavy for my nose only then( ?), I almost doze off in every class, I use a stop-watch while taking a shower(hooked to this one lately) , I observe the lines on my palm changing daily, I can spend hours curling my hair, Green tea soothes me instantly, I am paranoid about my waist line, I hate shopping for clothes coz I cant choose, I am very bad at remembering roads, I have midnight hunger pangs etc. But I still cannot write that simple “About Me”. I started writing this blog with the intention of knowing myself better, to understand how I think and until today I could not write anything “About Me”.

I still have to explore, analyse, achieve more… to be able to become a person whom I always wanted to be… and maybe then I could proudly write about me - effortlessly.

In the mean time , I am going to fill in that space with something!!!!!!!

Rewind

2010-02-21T20:04:00.001-08:00

And then there comes a point in your life when you want to become a child again!!
Childhood memories always take me back to Summer holidays in Secundrapur – the place where my Grandparents stay. The 2 months vacation always flew in the flick of a moment…

It is basically a small village in Bidar district (Karnataka).

Our mornings were always spent in watching Gangappa milk the cows.We all cousins are closely bound…and maybe that’s why we chose to brush our teeth together and wait for kallamma to give us the washed cups and saucers . The historic toilet was in the terrace… we all went there together too …well for two reasons …first to fetch water as and when needed and then to help lock the door from outside (with a big stone) …counting the hens and chickens in the backyard waiting for our turns :D to use it.

We used to have a small Rangoli session thereafter … we draw them at 7 different places daily after Sharnamma sprinkled the cowdung water over the entire front yard…

Our afternoons usually were spent in inventing some or the other new game and spending our entire summer playing it… Like for instance – swim-swam (we used to swim actually on the cemented floor of a room which was very smooth and shiny– just giving a push to ourselves against the walls thus sliding away from it..), Poo-Ri (where we are poor in the first half and survive on leaves of trees and suddenly become this ultra rich in the second half when Amma used to call us for sumptuous lunch J then fouji (yes…ofcourse enacting as if we are soldiers and do a dhishum-dhishum-dham for the rest of the day..) ..We also used to play boating…..again in that special swimming pool room …a very big cooking vessel served as our boat… with 2 of us sitting in it and the rest helping it revolve J over the entire room.

We used to arrange the wedding of our dolls with Amma actually cooking special delicacies on that day….. We had this one day(our Grand parent’s wedding anniversary) of cultural event when we performed either skit or a dance for which we practiced our entire summers secretly…Bhasmasur and Mohini, Rikki-chikki-ghost, kiti sangu me sangu konala (marathi song) were few of them.

We usually spent our early evenings with some outdoor and well some sensible games like Gilli-danda , 4-corners, Dabba-fekam-fek - funny name which meant catching a box (since balls weren’t available) across a rope ..we actually created whole new rules for it and used to play doubles J too. At times we used to take a stroll to the fields accompanying our Grandpa….Now the interesting part was the way we used to walk …we had this imaginary ponies with us and we used to supposedly ride them …Now imagine we hopping like ponies with hands holding imaginary ropes and mumbling “tugudak-tugudak” till we reached our destinations..Now I wonder what passersby would be thinking seeing us like this… we were crazy!!!

Most of the times sunset was spent observing the skies changing colours hogging Amma’s special curd rice on the terrace watching cows coming back home.

Nights were spent in story telling...yours truly was one of the fav story teller.. I remember making up long stories. .Chandralekha, Shaitan Rakshas, Tiger were the favorite characters.. I once cooked up the story of “Vishwamitra” that lasted for three hours…After few days my cousins wanted to hear that story again!!! I had a hard time recollecting it exactly (well they all remembered it quite well) and re-narrating it.

I look back to those days as some story that we listened to …doesn’t feel like we actually lived those moments.. We had a wonderful childhood -touchwood. But I think , for everybody - - it is special !! I remember as a child we all long to grow up –to go to college and then to office and then there comes a point in life when you want to be a child again!!

Places and Spaces

2010-02-16T10:47:00.003-08:00

Like I already mentioned in my last post, that recently I moved in to a new place …yet again ..Now that I am arranging my new closet , kitchen , bedroom , livingroom – it just reminded me of all the places that I have stayed in over the past couple of years..

It was after my graduation that I first stepped out of my home and started living in spaces wherein I tried creating my temporary comfort zones – well never comfortable though ! Those were at times the corner of a room , a side of room , the centre of a room ..yes sharing it with others most of the time…
Year 2004 - It was with Maya , Prachiti , Pragati for the first time with whom I was staying with as a Paying Guest.So all of us in one room – the room that always stinked no matter what we did. Where we had these amazing rules …The rules were weird for me as a first timer. I have gone through this list of rules quite a number of times after that from Model Colony to Praire Shores.

Later, I moved in a 2 Bedroom apartment with 6 other girls the – my second time. Neha , Anjali, Kalyani, Jyolsna, Pratibha, Nitu . We had an amazing experience wd guys during our stay here. Yes, since we were a bunch of girls , that’s an obvious tale to follow. Somebody used to ring our bell at 3 AM early mornings, or just switch off the Mains.Two of us together used to take turns, torches and courage to get the keys from the boy's apartment ( we were not given the basement keys) , go to the basement and switch on the light… to resume our studies. Later on we also heard interesting stories of how the place was haunted since a girl who owned it had committed suicide and how it was abandoned forever after that only for us to start living there. One fine day because of some major tiffs between the landlord and university authorities (who had actually helped us find the place) we had to vacate the place on a one day notice and since we did not have any other place we stayed in some God forbade “khandar” types very old university quarters illegally for over a week until we found our next place … It was perfect except that we had to drink the water from the tap in the washroom (the only working tap ) …and shared it with a dog and a cat who used to once in a while pop in through some window which we did not know of.

Thriving on Vada pav , samosas and cut chais , we shifted to yet another place and then to a different place. Well years passed by … but this move continued. Over 12 places in almost 6 years. The only things that changed were the room mates and the cities… from Pune to Chicago and now finally to San Ramon .. yes but this time – theres this one more big difference .. a room mate for life :) .. so I guess I can bear this for a few more times ..

Yes, the nomad’s life is fun , you see so many places , people .. you take something from each of them and give something back ..you fight , you learn , you listen , you laugh , you connect.You explore so many things about yourself. And then the bad part ..the moment you begin to feel the comfort, you have to pack your bags and ready yourself for the next move.

I now long for a place that will be my own , always – a place which wont be yet another space to be filled in , but a home and stop living in the suitcases for once , keeping the fun and the thrill aside !!! I guess that is how you start feeling at 27 …okay almost 28 !! Maybe :)

Check All

2010-02-11T17:25:00.003-08:00

Life’s been full of surprises for me over the past year. Series of unexpected things coming in all the unexpected ways..

I have been travelling , packing , unpacking , shifting , jet-lagged-ing, working - all of it for the past couple of months. All of it left me with exhaustion. I have actually become numb – to almost everything. I am not sure of how long this state of “trance” would last ?

It was since this last week that I am unpacking and settling in, in a new place yet again, I flipped through the pages of my diary only to see the “to-dos” for 2009. To my surprise , I could check all of them..mind you they were not all that simple and easy …but things just felt into place quite smoothly …

I mean , can you imagine? So far this has never ever happened to me … I could never even stick to a simple resolution of getting up early :) forget anything else…

Now that all the small and big tasks are done , I am all geared up to make a new list for this year… yes I don’t think you need a new year's eve or a birthday or any special day to make a resolution – you can do it just anytime around the year ….

This stupid but pleasant thing has given me a high for the day :)

Of His and Her:5

2009-07-28T17:02:00.000-07:00

Everybody was amazed at how successful He is, almost at everything he does…Successful being a middle –class. His boss liked him, his sub-ordinates liked him..infact he was everybody’s favorite. He had solution for everybody, everything.

His kids were also doing very good at studies.

Most of them wondered infact, how can anyone get so many things , just easily?

He knew the answer. Her. Because she prays for him. Every single moment she is awake.

Bedridden for more than 13 years and unable to reciprocate the love and care she gets, she thought this is the only thing she could do for him. She has conviction that prayers have magical powers.

And he believes that she is!!

Bhaakri

2009-07-10T21:18:00.003-07:00

I made Bhaakri /Jowar roti for the first time !!

Duh... tough job !!!!

Herez for you all to see it :) served with "Paatichya Kandyachi Bhaaji/Spring onion Curry" and "Garlic chutney"

Of His and Her:4

2009-07-04T22:46:00.002-07:00

Discussions with Sheila always made her irritant, picky but more so sad. It wasn’t that she was not happy , she was convincing herself hard that she was ! And she was absolutely okay marrying him. 6 years of marriage dint change him or his simplicity and sincerity. And that was what she had initially liked in him. That was pretty much it. She always knew she was right. Even today, she could sense the bitterness in her relative’s tone while referring him , him whom she chose over the “other” proposal. Sheila reminded her of the same tone, somehow. Sheila boasted of everything she had !

Memories were still so fresh … 6 years later …! Its not a less time...not when every day you get up to run a new race. The home loan, the family responsiblities etc always kept them on their toes. This year too they decided that next year would be a better time to start a new family. She was too tired to handle all this. Slogging like forever made her look older than what she was. 6 years is definitely not a less time when you know that this is no way close to how you wanted your life to be.

HORN !!!!! The screech almost scared her. She shivered for a moment.She hated it when any body scolded her for not concentrating while driving her two-wheeler which infact somebody or the other did daily….She was too soft to answer them back though. And she knew she is wrong most of the times.

Reaching home, on the kitchen platform, she found her cup of tea with a lid on it. As usual. Coming back to the present ,she felt guilty for her thoughts of re-convincing herself about the decision she took 6 years back. Sipping it with tea, she found him in the corner of the living room busy sewing something.
“Hey what are you doing ? Should I? “

“Nevermind, I just found this button , and figured out why you don’t use this dress anymore. You look so good in it…I just thought of buttoning it up…and… its done” he replied looking at her.

She felt stupid for reassuring herself of the fact she was already so darn sure of !

Tears rolled down her cheek as she ran towards him to give him a tight hug.

Stuffed Okra / Bharli Bhendi

2009-06-29T21:11:00.008-07:00

Ingredients :

Okra/ladies finger
Groundnut powder
Coconut powder
Cumin seed powder
Coriander powder
Curry leaves powder
Garam Masala
Asafoetida (Hing)
Turmeric powder
Cumin Seeds
Lemon Juice
Salt

Procedure :

Wash Okra and wipe it until dry. Roast them slightly for 2 min on low flame.
Slit it vertically but make sure you don’t break it into two halves.

Mix coconut powder, groundnut powder , cumin seed and coriander powder, asafetida,Curry leaves powder, very little garam masala, salt to taste.

Stuff your cut Okra with the mix made above.

It will look like :

Take a pan , add a teaspoon full of oil , add cumin seeds and turmeric powder.
Add the stuffed Okra and let it cook for 10 min on medium flame.
Make sure you don’t keep the lid above throughtout. That might make it smudgy/watery.

Your yummy Stuffed Okra is ready .

Serve it with hot parantha , phulka or chapati with Curd /pickle /dash of lemon juice as per your taste.

Hiatus!!

2009-05-17T20:05:00.003-07:00

It’s been a long hiatus on this space here…. Partly because of studies, submissions…well honestly these would be all lame reasons…probably it was the ennui ….of What? The routine? No coz u need to have one for that.. yes!! Here everyday welcomes new set of tasks that are waiting to be done..well more or less revolving around the “same” things though…!!

The ennui of running behind the goals that you set for yourself….wherein you reach a stage when u are really confused of why you started one at the first place?

Or probably, it’s just the cluttered thoughts that I wasn’t able to put clearly!! I must be kidding….how can I put “cluttered” thots “clearly”? Well true!!

There could be similar such reasons for this…but clearly it wasn’t because I dint have anything to write about…No never..!! I am never short of stories…things…observations.. thoughts…because I talk to myself often..Almost always…No no I am no nerd!! Of this, I realised lately while giving a small presentation…in those nerve wracking 10 minutes where I had so much to talk about , I had so much to think of something else simultaneously…yes I have a very efficient inbuilt “parallel processor” !

I guess….the hibernation time is over for this blog… and I would write more often now…about? Same ol’ things….

In the past couple of months, I have been running way too much…well unfortunately not on treadmill….:p Anyway, the project that I worked hard on managing my coursework ended well and we celebrated it on the 96th Floor of the Hancock… What was more intriguing for me was the way I mingled out comfortably with all the folks that I worked with…all of them from different countries…Friends n family who know me know that I get intimidated badly with a new group, I get instantly uncomfortable …..But, probably not anymore….

Probably I am changing…Can I say growing?

Just when...

2009-03-18T14:10:00.002-07:00

There are so many things to do and just so little time ….I wish I had few more hours in my day or atleast some less sleep :) As far as I can go back in time, I always have had this “if only I get some free time, I would love to..” phases probably forever. And I keep wondering just when I am going to get it.

The answer is probably never. The beauty of life is that it always keeps you busy like an enthralling movie – keeping you at the edge of your seat.. never realising when it gets over…days just pass by, fast as always. Whats intriguing is , it applies to all the days, of rains and sunshine …

Well, I have reached a stage where my “to do someday” list is so lopsided that it burdens me sometimes. I get crazy over it…I think I should either stop adding any more items in that list or just start working on it right away!! Well, since the first one is highly impossible I am left with the relatively easier option. The time to do something is always “now” or “never” and I am close to believing it more with every passing day.

The wish list is so simple…simple because its more about the things that I would like to do for my personal peace and happiness ,when I get some leisure, and its so simple to be happy … but yet so difficult to start with. Why? Time again.

And then ,
I suddenly realize that I don’t remember anything that I studied in geography, history or sciences …forget that engineering too seems to be a bygone era.. Especially when you need to implement some concept of which you don’t remember anything at all..
I think , this is another issue that I have swiftly shifted on to now.. pause!

I know, take a deep breath!!!! And start with one thing at a time.

And as always , that one thing is studies and more studies…and more work in the lab…
And as far as other things, aah well I will do them when I get some free time.. yo!! Back to square one!!!

Womanhood

2009-03-09T22:33:00.003-07:00

Woman’s Day was never this meaningful to me before..a day to take a moment out and thank all those wonderful souls out there who help me live all the bitter sweet moments in life with a pinch of salt… who have taught me small-big things and upon whom I look upto …not to become like them but atleast try to take one positive from each of them...

Of raining...

2009-02-28T19:38:00.004-08:00

When it rains here, it rains heavily…skies darken ..Everything is at a lull… I clicked this snap from the window in my library while havin lunch. Well I know its not a very gr8 pic to boast about, but yeah, the very first one that I took from blackberry and could import it successfully in my laptop.Ok. Fine, this is not a place to boast about that. I know!!

Well, yea..Rains… havin lunch all alone while rainin heavily definitely took me back to India…and all the rains that I have had there..the good ones, the bad ones, the messiest (I don know whether that’s even a word) ones..but honestly much better than here..there u have the curiosity of runnin over the window to watch it raining…n the oohs n aahs in the most girly ways wd ur sissies or dear frnds..That reminds me of the rains one day, when me and Bhakti drove to a temple not very closeby getting all drenched up and then got back to our cubicles after half an hour of trying to dry ourselves in the hand-dryer in the washroom. Now, aint that crazy?
N now, I sit here tryin to take it as normally as I can wdout letting me affect it in any way.
Atleast there, u hv ur mom opening the doors handin u a cuppa tea …which while sippin rips off all the irritation that the rains might have caused…
And here, I head back to the lab…and later to a door that’s locked….
Awwww!!!

Ok. This ones another pic…describing the deadness(I am quite unsure of this word too ..eeks..what m I doin?) of the library…I don’t know whether it’s the rains or the heavy lunch that makes me feel lethargic…and well, dumb!!

Well, gotto go now!!

p.s : I have tried my best not to make it an emotional post!

Snow fall

2009-02-23T22:01:00.003-08:00

Season is the best quantifiable measure of how time flies. They come and go. Winters, Summers, Fall and winters all over again. I remember how Fall made me so sad inspite of being so beautiful. And now it’s the snow. The trees are now all bare. Well they knew they would be. The colors all lost. Its black and white. Snow is everywhere. The only colors are those of cars or some other things which don’t have life in them. And those with life have become colorless and hence lifeless. I look at the snow and don’t know how does it make me feel. Its supposedly so sad, so silent so chilled. The only thing that u see while walking back is the footprints in the snow …that u carefully follow without knowing whose they are , just to avoid thumping in the snow. I don’t see the chipmunks anymore. Forget flowers and plums.
Everybody knows that snow is depressing. It gives a sinking feelin ..U hardly see the sun.
So its either snow or snow storm .and if not that then the rains..Everything seems to be standstill even though u are moving on , the time is moving on. The snow flakes are untouched white and soft. I catch a few but only with my leather gloved hands… The silence I feel somehow is not haunting… its peaceful. May be the white color gives u tat. The snow laden carpet to walk, every bush growing cotton flowers…. If u observe closely, u can wonder how snow falls in unreachable crevices wherein it becomes ice to be melted down by the sunrays. The silence is harmonious. It connects u wd urself. U talk less, observe more, explore less evolve more. Its my second winter season here and I already feel I am so used to it…as if I grew with all this.
It doesn’t bog me down, swing my moods or depress me. It doesn’t irritate me either. I blink my eyelids as I feel the snow flake gently settling on them. It gives a tickling feelin and I feel I belong to a far off land , playing a character in some fairy tale…, or one of those hobbits wearing the heavy snow jackets making my way towards my home.

Coffee

2009-02-16T23:44:00.002-08:00

He was talking at length and she was listening
With a smile in her eyes…
She had waited for this day for so long..A coffee with him.
She dint sleep the entire night out of sheer excitement..
Of how it would go.

She rehearsed her lines, cat-walked in her stilettos..
Bought a dress just for a coffee wd him..

And that’s not all ..

She made it sure what to order and not to seem confused..
And how? She tried almost every coffee in CCD the complete week..
Irish , cold coffee, French vanilla, hazel nut,
roasted almond, Cappuccino, Decaf

Everything …!!!

Her thoughts were interrupted by him.. “And how about you? “
“Well…umm ..Aarrrrph…” She burped quite audibly.
Blood rushed to her cheeks out of embarrassment

“Damn it…Acidity” she murmured to herself.

Of His and Her:3.2

2009-02-01T18:13:00.004-08:00

That same day :
Today he is getting engaged…to his girl friend of 2 years. Ayushi was everything that he thought he was looking for except the fact that she was not ‘her’….”her” who had a special place in his heart … He smiled to himself…
He had thought of telling his feelings to her at many occasions, but by the time he was sure enough to do that, she was already engaged and soon happily married to Rohit. He hated himself for that... but life moves on …and so did he.
Ayushi was beautiful than her, definitely less short tempered than her ...shut up he thought to himself..how can he compare both of them...now!!! He had started hating this habit of his too ...
He remembered all the college days, the moments that he had spent with her..the discussions they had . The lilies that she had got on his birthday were still fresh in his mind. “I don’t want any thorns in our “Friendship”" was her quirk response for not bringing in roses like others :) The momentary moments had in them the feelings so eternal. He had realized it quite late that some part of his heart was lost forever.
Everybody clapped…and he looked up into Ayushi’s eyes.. her cheerful and hopeful eyes, eyes that had only him in them and he felt guilty for not feeling the same. He knew he has to be a very good husband and that he would be one.
And as for “her”, he was sure that he can never forget her however hard he tries…some feelings are yours - only yours , and he knew that this secret will always be one.
But he was wrong.

To be Continued.

Of His and Her:3.1

2009-01-23T18:43:00.001-08:00

She had known him for 8 yrs now...and loved him for 6 of them.They were not the best of friends, she knew she couldn’t be a friend to him for she would have to talk with him often for that, which she chose not to. Her eyes would have easily revealed her crazy feelings towards him. He had chosen to move out of the city and today he was going to leave. She was sitting in front of the telephone thinking whether to call him or not..just when the phone rang.. and yes, it was him. His voice was angry, not that he showed it, but definitely he was..”you didn’t even bother to call me when everybody else had called..” ..”I was goin to call u” ..”when ? ..its just 15 min left for my bus..I don’t know what’s wrong with you”… he hung the phone ..and she closed her eyes …tears rolled down her cheek.. she knew she was the most stupid girl she had ever known ..

6 yrs later, she opened her eyes in the middle of the night …a broken dream woke her up. It was him yet again ..she was frustrated… stuck somewhere…she wished she had told him then long back…atleast she would have moved on with her life for now… She woke her baby up…she caressed Ira, her 2 yr old daughter until she fell asleep…
It was 5.30 am. She had a busy day ahead-packing lunch boxes for her husband ,Rohit, and Ira , dropping Ira at crèche, going for work, drive all the way back picking up Ira ,shopping, cooking and laundary !!..All her days were more or less the same. She was a very caring and devoted wife..a typical Indian wife , she would call herself..which she had become overnight after her wedding with Rohit whom she met in a family get together.
She knew that she loved Rohit and had vowed to be with him until death does them apart.
But then why all this, she thought to herself…How can she deeply love two people..that too at the same time. Some things, feelings, relations probably you can just never figure out.

She looked out of the sky trying to look beyond the stars… into nothingness… …

To be continued.

The year that was...!!!

2009-01-22T12:46:00.002-08:00

Today I am a year ahead than what I was last year ...putting in simple words.. !
But also, I completed one year of coming here ..the US of A.
Years come and go…u live every year..every single day..some days are easy some very hard.., but whatever, years later , wen u think of any year in ur mind..there are so few things associated wd it… I mean , just imagine , u close ur eyes and think of an year say 2002 or 1995 ..every year has few signifgicant happenings..which marks the memory of that year but alas just at a glance.. So strange..u live it wd soo much of stress, and pain and struggle just to later realize that its gonna be not even a minutes worth of memory …as simple as flipping a page in a book..!

I hope this sudden realization will help me take things easy and not go bonkers over anything and everything I undertake..this year…

ps: I am back :)

Well-no title!

2008-11-19T20:21:00.004-08:00

Actually, I am in a s-oo-per time crunch these days, managing term-end submissions , job and studies..but just squeezed in some time to scribble down this one..coz it’s something that has made me mighty proud of myself :)
This weekend , we finally decided to clean our place..after many weeks..coz trust me it was getting unbearable to stay in a dusty, dirty carpeted room ..wherein I saw a teeny tiny bed – bug…excuse me for this one, but I do get monica-esque hyper when it comes to them …we have spent our entire summer literally living in trash bags-courtesy that painstakingly time plus patience testing (and even blood-tasting) bed-bug treatment!!

So this Saturday saw our “lets do cleaning” energies at a very high level… only to realize that our dear (read expensive and new) vacuum cleaner had stopped working- It was actually working , but the “dust-bag” wasn’t getting filled up….It took a lot of analysis, study , unscrewing, testing, cleaning, screwing it(not the other one though) up for more than 2 hrs to finally make it work… :)

I have assembled, 2 big closets, shoe racks, table , chair etc (wd the help of some frnds) in the past couple of months.. This is a phase of growing up – in every sense..living independently, handling almost all the issues- big and small, studies and jobs, paying off ur bills(on time) , and standing this cold here (sorry folks, now this cold is gonna be an inherent part of my posts for the rest of the winter I guess :) ) where one day we get up to see our washroom filled with water (yes, trust me , here too) , the other sees our kitchen full of flies..(we do keep it clean :)) , where one day the water tub is clogged, and the other our balcony door doesn’t close wen the temp outside gets damn chilly…and I cant skip mentioning about the damaged door-knob of the washroom which had to undergo a replacement coz 'A' was locked in there and we ended up calling the emergency !!!

Aren’t all these things very petty … but even these small issues , though very insignificant, do make you feel happy at times when resolved …small things also have that ability…I was surprised infact! Wonder how this “sense of accomplishment” can have such a big spectrum wherein in the lower limit can be so infinitesimally small but more importantly –easy yet satisfying...As they say; Happiness you see is just a state of mind.

5-fast facts!!!

2008-11-05T00:21:00.003-08:00

Five Things...small-big, noticeable-unnoticeable, after coming here, besides other important things:
1) Five things that I learned to use:

Blackberry-Bluetooth, GPS, Microwave oven, US style washing and drying machines and swipe a card for a travel in train/bus for local transportation besides many other things :)

2)Five states I saw:
Illinois, California, Pennsylvania, Indiana,Newyork (can say.. :p)

3)Five shopping malls that I hop a lot:
Macy’s, Kohl,Old Navy, JC Penny, Walmart

4) Five tings I learnt to adjust with:
French vanilla Coffee (7/11), Chai Tea Latte (Starbucks) , Doughnuts, Taqcuitoes, Cheetos

5)Five phrases/ words that I have started using often :
Dude
Gas station
Desi/ABCD/Amru/Makku/Chinki :)
Fish

Dollars/Dimes/Cents.. ofcourse :)

Enough right?..there would be many more such things that I would go on..and on..

But..but the things that I miss here….are ”innumerable” … :)

Faces and places …

2008-11-01T23:58:00.005-07:00

Hooosh…yet another submission! Masters is, trust me, one tiring job…
The assignments, projects, submissions, mid-terms, presentations, then research work…everything ties you up so much...keeps u on your toes...all the time…!!As far as my memory allows me to go back ,in the past one year, I am always answering almost every call with a “I have a submission in some time..will definitely call u back..“
My sincere apologies for the same :)
I guess this is one real patience testing of all the near and dear ones, the family and frnds..
I feel extremely sorry about it, but guess cant help …probably the only easy solution is finishing off my masters ASAP :)

Its almost a lil over two months wd my new job as a research assistant…
And it’s been dreadfully hectic probably from day 1…
It’s just in the middle of waiting for some simulation run to get over that I suddenly turn around and look back only to realize the “getting used to” feeling of once all new faces…
How P,B,R,K,M,G who once surrounded my cube have suddenly replaced by Li, Feng, Min Soo, Hiacheng, Yu-chi, Wei (yeah, enough of flaunting remembering names.. ;)) …

And leaves a stirred feeling somewhere…
The usual coffee breaks, carom and Table Tennis, breakfast-lunch-snack routine is now completely replaced by coffee-at-desk, lunch-at-desk …where work was fun…
Where your not saying anything was enough for others to understand you has replaced by me looking into faces…staring at them...trying to figure out the words they are trying to say…break them up- try to form a sentence and derive some logical sense out of it.. Arrgh!! Nevermind..this is a very normal and healthy communication! Shoosh..

There’s no zing in the dip-dip tea anymore…that extra tea bag wont serve any better…

Yes I know it takes some time to get used to a new place, new schedule, new routine, new life..and if you ask me , its pretty easy…Infact what I have realized is that its easy in the beginning coz you are all set to explore new horizons, dive into new oceans of unpredictability, and the fact that moving into a new place keeps you so busy wd the first few days.. You end up having a feeling more of exertion and exhaustion …In the course of overcoming all the initial problems..You never realize how easily you blend with the new environment, routine, people …! But suddenly, at times, for no reason, you realize that you are amidst aliens...Or probably you yourself are an alien here...
But however hard you try, to try to adjust with new faces, you tend to miss those comfort giver faces…even more… with tons of sweet memories attached to every face...

I am unwillingly putting an end to this post before I take off yet another “free flight” to India …:p coz today I want to catch up with my long yearned sleep !!!!

Of His and Her:2

2008-10-23T23:33:00.000-07:00

Sitting in his Pacific facing office cubicle, and sipping hot coffee he was giving a cursory look to his presentation which he had to give in another 15 min…
…And bang popped in an email from still in touch school friend with an attached grade 8th unclear scanned copy of group class photograph…He spotted her almost instantly.. … she was at the rightmost side …petite and pale..Nobody would have noticed her…
He hardly remembered her..he thought to himself…
Always sitting in the first row and promptly answering the questions in the class almost all the time ..is what he thought he only remembered of her..
Wait a minute. She had those two tight plaits always neatly oiled and tied with ribbons, wore a skirt slightly above the knees…showing off her scarred knees…

Actually, He vaguely remembered her !!…

She had a doggie double her size who he was scared of initially had gradually kind of become his friend ,if not her…Gosh..did he borrow her class notes so many times?

He remembered almost everything about her…

Her favorite color was sky blue...she was the only girl who had answered that after growing up, would want to be social worker unlike others who wanted to become an Engineer or a Doctor....

And yes, every color suited her so well…even for her wheatish complexion…

It took him almost 10 yrs to realize that he loved her… that it wasn’t just an infatuation, that his heart still skips a beat just thinking about her and unfolding the reason of why all the small-big scoops of relationships he had till date could never blossom into a steady state of “commitment”. It was definitely high time that he atleast let her know…

Miles away, on a busy Malad bus stop , missing her routine bus, she is waiting for another one to come…it was a long but fulfilling day for her…as usual ..she enjoyed spending her time and doing her bit for the special kids. She was simplicity personified…Her peace of mind reflected on her face. Scribbling into her daily expenditure diary, she was busy mumbling the numbers to herself, unaware of his love for her.

Fall...

2008-10-17T20:49:00.000-07:00

Everything is bloody silent…..The place seems as a no man's land…Sudden drop in temperatures and fall break would be the reason probably…. The only thing disturbing this non perturbing death silence was the crushing of leaves underneath my feet....yeah, it’s Fall and hence the place is completely laden with leaves..
Something’s so awfully weird with this Fall …everything is so colorful…yet not lively. Probably coz its cloudy most of the times…
Its probably the most beautiful season …as they say…entire tree wearing a colorful garb and then all of them making oh so lovely combinations and patterns as if dressed up for a party …but no…to me they all seemed dreadful…yeah , maybe tats the word and tats how I felt.. Everything’s silent…and not the silence tat is peaceful, or serene or even melodious…silence as if in a relationship..Not the one where everythingz conveyed without words, but the one in which there’s nothing much left to talk…dreadful!!!
I felt as if all the trees know that this beauty of their's is ephemeral and would soon fade away…its going to be short-lived… maybe they felt like the soldiers fighting a lost battle waiting for losing their lives…
They all are shedding their leaves …one by one…giving away to winters..
Where everything would be soon frozen…colors and time…literally…
I walk slowly so as not to disturb the silence looking at a worn out leaf twisting, swirling gently with the breeze on its way to reunite with the others...let me catch it and bookmark it forever .. After all it’s my first Fall!!

Flying High

2008-10-12T21:26:00.000-07:00

Strangely , I saw a bird flying in the sky …
Strange because it was raining…and extremely chilly..
even before the sunset it was unusually dark…
Standing at my window side, I watched it flying..

I wish I could talk with it..and know what was wrong…

Maybe, t’was in search of shelter or food ..
Maybe lost its way back home…
Maybe in search of a lost loved one…

Or maybe was it just the rains that made me so sulky

Maybe it was out to enjoy the rains….
Maybe to get wet and drenched…
Maybe celebrating life !
Or maybe it had just realized the strength of its wings…

Nevermind… !

Cuddling in my cozy bed I thought to myself..
Whatever it be… It was brave hearted…
Coz, it definitely needs courage to fly alone, in the rains….

I wonder...

2008-09-30T22:52:00.003-07:00

On my way to school today , I met a squirrel….
A lil on the heavier side,

it looked at me and ran hastily…

Busy searching food…it winked at me
So tiny yet so brave…

I met a rabbit two steps ahead…
Seeing me , it hid behind the bush.. busy biting a “plum”
I stood there still to watch it yet again,

And slowly it peeped out as if to check me out..

So timid, yet so independent…

I smiled and moved ahead…
Then I saw a butterfly…

yellow colored sitting on the yellow flower..
I thought maybe even they "match" these days..

Now I am sure it noticed me , coz it flew n sat on the other flower..
So beautiful, yet so pure..

I crossed the road and then I saw..
So many vehicles with honking horns,

signal posts, and pollution around..
I wondered whteher it’s the same world?

A street across..
Yes it was…the same , yet so different…!!

Of His and Her:1

2008-09-16T22:43:00.000-07:00

He opened his lunch box…to find
-black eye peas (kidney-beans) curry..his favorite..
No no actually her favorite
-Raddish raita
-Mango pickle
-4 chapatis

And a note saying

“I am missing you, right now”

He smiled…..

At some far off place sitting in the office cubicle, her eyes twinkled.

The Road Less Traveled

2008-09-14T20:30:00.000-07:00

Two roads diverged in a yellow wood,

And sorry I could not travel both

And be one traveler, long I stood

And looked down one as far as I could

To where it bent in the undergrowth;

Then took the other, as just as fair,

And having perhaps the better claim,

Because it was grassy and wanted wear;

Though as for that the passing there

Had worn them really about the same,

And both that morning equally lay

In leaves no step had trodden black.

Oh, I kept the first for another day!

Yet knowing how way leads on to way,

I doubted if I should ever come back.

I shall be telling this with a sigh

Somewhere ages and ages hence:

Two roads diverged in a wood,

and I—I took the one less traveled by,

And that has made all the difference.

-Robert Frost

Yes,unfortunately, it still happens!!

2008-09-13T17:56:00.000-07:00

It was raining heavily outside. Inside, the clk was ticking slowly…very slowly….second by second .Everything seemed so unbearable, as if its never gonna end..After slogging whole night yesterday, I dint see this coming…I was feeling numb…yet I kept telling myself that this will also pass….hold on…somehow!! At times, things are so unperceivable, however hard you try…I was trying hard, to concentrate on the rains outside… but that made the feeling inside still worse..
Some words…as if from some far off place kept falling on my dumb ears.. …..
Finally, the clock struck 5.30 pm…and the whole day ka (supposedly 9 to 4.30) lecture got over and instantly I became normal…suddenly every thing got back life :) !!

Success

2008-08-31T19:22:00.000-07:00

Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. Courage is what counts. -Sir Winston Churchill
One thing that I have learnt from life is that it is one helluva roller coaster ride….full of bumps, of twists and turns, of highs and lows…all in one go!!!
Well, recently I hit a small set milestone and I am very happy about it… (I know it’s very much unlike me, I mean everybody who knows me knows the “dumb” reaction tat I give for everything, next to karve putala hopefully..;p)I know though the achieved goal is very small, its given me a confidence and reaffirmed my belief in “hard work”..Wanted to take a moment off –and analyze.
Looking back, I can amusingly notice that so far, I have never achieved a set target…well, on time I mean. And some of things, actually most of them are “time variant”…you want some things…but you want them “now”…you getting it at a later point of time actually takes away the excitement and satisfaction from it...and of course the sense of accomplishment.
Well, first day in the lab reminded me of my first day of job…dated 20th September 2004..the happiness that you get when you are assigned your desk, your desktop, your phone etc.
Yes, the excitement is still there…”to live each moment with the liveliness and curiosity of that of child and you will never grow old”.. (I made tat all by myself jlt..;) )
Jokes apart, yes I have to look forward.. make the most of this opportunity..,… work harder. I hope that form all the past failures, I carry forward the lessons and apply them in the most appropriate context.
I know, the journey so far wasn’t that all a cake walk..infact it was a series of hardships, tons of risks, n definitely hazy..coz no matter how much hard-work u put in, at times , that 1 percent luck-or no luck, just takes everything away..It wouldn’t have been possible without the unflinching support of my family and friends…I feel double lucky to have the best of them all with me… wen one door closes, there are many other un-noticed doors open…its upto you , whether you wanna spend time staring and cribbing over the closed one or grab onto the one that’s open and make the best out of it…
I know this isn’t a winning speech that I am making here…but the journey of thousand miles begins with a single step…it took a lot of strength to take that first step…
Getting way too philosophical, errrrr, never mind, success n failures make u one :p!!!

With another piece fitting in so exactly in my picture my times up of retrospection, I have set another short term goal…and lets see…how well I perform this time.

Here, I go !!!

Life

2008-07-21T12:17:00.000-07:00

Vaishali, the name still lingers in my mind…the eyes still haunt me…its been 2 yrs , n I had enough reasons in life to forget her…but her face is still vivid in my memory. I m talking about a 3 and a half year old whom I met in samparc, an orphanage in Malavali, near Lonavala
We(our office group) could manage to go there 2-3times in our pint-sized attempt of spending some quality time with the kids …
we had a chance of meeting around 80 children…every child special in his/her own way…how we got the idea of visiting the place, how did we conduct the sessions there is not what I wish write here…

It’s there, where I met Vinayak, a boy studying in 4th grade…he sang the “powada” (its type of folk song sung in praise of Shivaji Maharaj) with pride …
Later that evening while on our way back, I had a chance of speaking with the concerned authorities. And the first question that popped up in my mind was about the know-hows of at least some of the kids…I simply couldn’t comprehend how could have “he” or “she” …actually almost all of them, land in there….
I wished I could get answers to few of my questions…But, the answers were appalling. I so very wished them to be far more different…or maybe they were far better unanswered. Nevertheless, they were all real!!!

Vinayak’s parents had committed suicide in front of him, when he was merely a kid studying in third grade… they avoided facing AIDS and preferred facing death …But what was Vinayak’s fault…he had to face it all for no mistake of his… the gruesome memory of which was still very clear to him…no doubt…he remembered it cut to cut..Scene to scene…date and time …and almost everything that could have happened that day…
A trauma for his entire life…but I will always remember him for the “powada” he sung…with pride, courage and confidence…

Vaishali – the youngest kid who was 3.5 yrs old and who was with the organization right from the age of 2 months…she had a phenomenal magnetism in her…she had big, dark black eyes! What was astonishing about her was the way she gelled with everybody…with ease… she hardly needed any introduction …you smile at her , and she will smile back at you stretching out her arm , her fingers sliding gently in yours…without even your realizing it…
Vaishali was an unfortunate daughter of a sex worker…who was left with no other option but to leave her at Samparc..

Then there were Baby (she had landed there from a remand home, nobody knows how she landed up there), Jayashree, Abhishek (proudly donning the name …since he shared it with his favorite actor Abhishek Bachhan) …
Every child had an heart wrenching story…and everybody was fully aware of their stories…But the best thing was this didn’t at all hinder their confidence – to live life , to enjoy life , to learn different things…Everybody came up with variety of ideas when asked to picture their imagination…
Their past did not stop them for thinking out of the box, did not limit them, their creativity. They all had a dream of who they wanted to become after growing up…and again it wasn’t a typical goody-goody answer but real answers…

I can go on and on…

I know there are so many vaishalis and vinayaks …
I am pretty sure that somewhere it would have been extremely difficult decision for their parents too...
Its sad that how can circumstances be so bullying that you have to take such ghastly decisions…
As an outsider, I feel connected to them in hardly 2-3 meetings, definitely it would have been the most painful moment for be it Vinayak’s parents or Vaishali’s Mother…

Or may be I don’t know…

Today almost two years later, I still remember them all, and also the promise that I had made to myself…..

While saying a good bye, I was thinking of what I can get for them the next time I visit, was just trying to remember everybody’s choices, hobbies…trying to figure out how maybe I can manage to get some funds from people I know who might help, or may be some nice clothes…etc…my thoughts were suddenly stopped by Baby, who with 3-4 other kids came running behind me calling out my name.. “Didi, we wanted to gift you something…and she gave me a beautiful hand made greeting card …with a message saying “thanks for spending time with us…do come again”…

मन म्हणजे स्वभाव नाही

2008-07-19T08:14:00.000-07:00

स्वभाव ग्रंथातले सूत्र दुसरे तीसरे व चोवठे

माणूस जन्माला आल्यावर त्याच्या सोबत त्याचा स्वभाव जन्माला येत नाही मुलाचे रदने त्याच्या अस्मितेचे द्योतक व जनक असते। हसने हे मनाच्या बीज भावाचे द्योतक असते। तिथून पुढे मन हलू हलू उगवू लागते। मनाचे बाल शरीर ध्वनि आहे।

अस्मिता, मन , प्रकृति आणि सवयी याने स्वभाव जन्माला येतो आणि त्यावर बुधिचे आणि paristhithi che संस्कार होऊंन त्याचे स्वरुप घडविले जात असते।

आपला स्वभाव नीबर आहे अशी ज्यांची समजूत आसते तसाच त्यांचा स्वभाव अदिकाधिक नीबर बनत जातो अ ज्यांना आपला स्वभाव संक्रमानाशील आहे असा वाटता ते शेवट पर्यंत स्वभावाची घदन घडवतात। आणि आशयहाती यशाची गुरूकिल्ली भेटते।स्वभाव जर स्वयम्भू असता , किव्वा न बदलता येणारा असता तर नीति-अनीति छे पाठ , किव्वा बार वाईट समजावून संगन्याची गरज राहिली नास्ति। हा थोड्या प्रमाणात स्वभ्हाव बाह्य गोष्टींवर अवलंबून असतो। स्वभावाची घ्दन शेक्दा तीस टक्के परस्वाधीन तर शेक्दा सत्ता टक्के स्वाधीन असते।आज कित्येक सुन्द्न्यान्नासुद्धा "swabhaav" म्हणजे नेमके काय हे माहिती नसते।

मन परिणीत होऊ शकते, बुद्धि तल्लख करता येते, अन स्वभाव बदलता येऊ शकतो हेच कोणाच्या मुलात लक्षात येत नही। मनाचा बीज भाव हा शरीर धर्मं, प्रकृति, प्राप्त्वातावरण, परिसर, अस्म्मिता यातून प्रकट होते। जय गोष्टीतून मनाचा जन्मा होतो त्यांच गोष्टींचा परिणाम पण मनावर सारखा होतो। मन जसे जसे अदिकधिक वाधिस लागते, त्से तसे ते अधिकाधिक आघात प्रत्याघात्क्षम बनते। साधारण पाचव्या महिन्या पासून हा क्रम सुरु होतो ते शेवट पर्यंत चालतो। ह्या प्रमाने मन हे जन्मबरोबर जनमत नाही, ते मागाहून १-२ महिन्यांनी जन्माला येते आणि मन जन्माला आले म्हणजे खर्या अर्थाने मांसाचा जन्मा होतो

मन व परिस्थिति हयात आघात प्र्यताघाताचा क्रम सुरु होंयाताच आपण ज्याला स्वभाव ,म्हणतो त्याचा बीज्भाव निहित असतो।परिस्थितीचा मनावर होणारा नित्य परीणाम आणि मन परिस्थिथि वर करणारे प्रत्याघात साधारण एक सारखेच असतात -ह्या सतत चालु रहन्यार्य क्रम अआतुना मनुष्य स्वभावाचे बाल शरीर घडविले जाते । पुढे मन व शरीर ह्याचे साहचार्य सुरु होते। प्रथम मनाच्या सवयी प्रमानेशरीराला प्रेरणा मिलते आणि पुढे शरीराच्या सवाई मनाला प्रेरणा देऊ लागतात। उदा: लहानपणी मन शरीराला व्यायामाची/योगसनाची सवय लावता। पुढे जावून हीच शरीराची सवय मनाला प्रेरणा देत। नियमित व्यायाम झाला तर मन प्रसन्ना रहता अथवा आलाशी शरीर मनाला आल्शी बनवता
ह्या आशय अनोंन्य प्रेर्य प्रेरक भावातुना मनाची घदन घडते त्यालाच अपन स्वभाव म्हणतो।

मनुष्यअच स्वभाव महअनला की तो, त्याची प्रकृति , मन , बुद्धि, आणि सवाई -असा दर्शाविता येतो पण स्वभाव म्हणजे मन नाही व स्वभाव म्हणजे बुदधी ही नही, स्वभाव म्हणजे इतर दुसरे तीसरे काहीही नही। त्याच्यात मात्र सर्व कही येता।

तर swabhaavaachi घदन आणि जड़ना ही एक निरंतर प्रक्रिया आहे।

----------------------

krsna

2008-07-07T19:44:00.000-07:00

I happened to visit an Iskon temple here yesterday...

Since it was Sunday, I planned my visit to match the bhajan timings.. This wasn’t my first time to Iskon though…long back , when in India , I had attended few of the discourses. And had participated in the rhythm of “hare krsna..” jaap…
I remember the weird feeling I had back then listening to the name of our own lord krishna in a very western accent.. that too by Indians..!! So much so.. that I had ended up asking a question as to why don’t you call out “Krishna”, “Rama” the way it is instead of “krsna”…n “ramo”….??The answer never convinced me though….

Years later, I was here in the huge santum sanctorum of the iskon temple… never knowing how I got to know about it and how eventually I was standing there…

After 15 min of discourse on 3 verses from Bhagvad Gita…the usual bhajan started…
“hare krsna…hare krsna…”

Gradually the spirits were up, moods were elated, without my noticing my hands started clapping to the tune, and…..everybody present was so engrossed in the melodius chanting of lord’s name…the entire ambience transformed into a blissful procession …everybody present had lost their ”being” into “Him” …happily singing and dancing without being conscious of who they are …may be that’s what they call it “krsna consciousness movement”….I cud see everybody praying to krsna, irrespective of cast , creed, color, religion…everybody..!! I could see the westerners dressed up in Indian attire, all the women draped in sarees , with the circle of vermillion on their foreheads.. Even while getting married out of one’s cast, in spite of true love, people have so much of apprehension…and these women were happily married to krsna’s religion….loving him selflessly …!!

All my questions were answered…krsna, by whatever name you call, will always mean the same… …carry the same sweetness, same depth and same bliss…tears rolled down my cheeks as I smiled back to the lord’s contented face tapping my feet to the tune, letting myself be completely “krsna-may” (being-krsna)

Hare krsna hare krsna, krsna krsna hare hare…
Hare rama , hare rama , rama rama hare hare!!!!

Independence day!!!!!

2008-07-05T22:22:00.000-07:00

Its my first '4th July' in US… and I stand here in my aparatment witnessing the horizon filled with the grandiose fireworks….. I felt the same happiness which I always had on Laxmi puja in Diwali back home… the city was full of colorful lights… the fireworks were indescribable…making different shapes , different colors rising in different patterns…and receding slowly some like shimmering stars, others like comets…disappearing effortlessly…..
I was awestruck seeing them…
The entire city was twinkling…Sears Tower standing tall crowned wd blue and Red color….Independance day special…
It reminded me of all the memories associated with our very own 15th August ... the morning assembly and national anthem , flag hoisting and school drills….and the way everybody flaunted a tricolor….

Today independence means much more to me… independence of thoughts, of choice , freedom of taking my own decisions , financial independence…! And I feel I am independent in true sense today….
I can set my own goals, decide my own boundaries, break the rules that I once set for myself…, can fearlessly stand against all the shackles of hypocrisy, can think of choosing right from wrong….I can move on wd life withouts carrying any “ifs n buts” …..

Today this independence means so much to me and I value every bit of it… understanding that wd it comes the responsibilty ….responsibility of making right decisions….rationally, without any prejudices… without compromising on any of the values…. Responsibility of making every dream come true…

Happy Independence day to me!!!!!

I am in love….

2008-07-05T21:45:00.000-07:00

Its been only 6 months in the city of Chicago and I already feel a part of it…The city breathes…
I came here in the peak of winters when it was snowing heavily…the temperatures reaching to freezing -29 to -30 degree Celsius…the first day I entered here I felt the chill wud make me die…I thot I took a wrong decision of shifting my base from my very own comfort zone…

I remember the tree barks though so thick skinned letting the cold dry them out …every tree looked so dead…not a single leaf…I had almost forgotten the colour- green!! My some of the classes wud get over at 9 pm. The first time I had to take the road back home was itself such a scary experience…..only 3 of us…on the loneliest streets ever in the most heavy snowstorm I had never even imagined of…the usual 7 min walk took us 45 min to reach our so called home…struggling our way against the dreadliest winds…for a moment I had thot tat I wud fly…

The days , though very short, seemed endless…..our only hope was summers…

The only relief we had was the place we were put up…a home away from home……12th floor of a 20 storeyed high rise… the college , studies, assignments , events, exams kept us quite busy and we some how survived the winters sipping our hot coffees watching the city change its colors…

Everything changed for better….sun peeped in pleasantly…and finally our snow jackets were in… slowly the city revealed its true colors …it suddenly seems so lively everywhere…the city has its own beauty …the skyline- includes structures like sears, Hancock, Water tower and many more.. downtown, places like magnificent mile, millennium park, planetorium, museums…navy pier ..the lakeshore, lake each n every place gives you a different feel…is full of life…

I can see the downtown from my apartment…n I see it daily…I see it in the mornings and in the evenings… our coffees taste so good now…with the downtown view on one side and the lake on the other…every time I see it , I want to see it more…the unpredictability of the weather – at times rainy, n again sunny in a flick of time …will swing ur mood wd it as well …...

Omigod…I am absolutely in love with Chicago!!!!!!!