Beyond Distance !!

Back in 2004 – I had enrolled myself for a Post Graduate Certificate Program from the Pune University. After our first class of Digital Design was over everybody left the classroom hurriedly except me and her. We both continued working on a problem although separately , sitting on different benches. After about 15- 20 minutes, we exchanged a “Hello” and that’s how our conversation started – about analyzing and solving the problem. And that’s how it all started. Our Friendship I mean. From that day we started studying together which involved Solving our assignments, studying for the examinations etc. We were sincere, hardworking and determined. I was then staying as a PG and she was staying with her relatives.

We usually met at Pataleshwar or Chatushringi and studied for hours together. On weekends, our study day started at around 7:30 am in the mornings and we would study until sunset. No gossips, no un-necessary talks. Purely studies. I remember discussing complex concepts of Advanced Digital Subsystem Design / VLSI fundamentals and VHDL / Verilog code snippets with her.

Eventually we both did well in the exams and co-incidentally found jobs in the same company within the same team. And probably that’s when we actually started to bond beyond studies. We shared an apartment. She taught me many things and helped me become a better person, honestly. She ingrained in me the quality of cleanliness – trust me.. ! Every Friday we cleaned our apartment by sweeping and wiping the floors/ arranging the piles of clothes neatly / cleaning the kitchen / washrooms. I used to tell her every Friday – that it’s Friday and we should instead be watching a movie or dine out but no we had to clean the apartment on Fridays. I started maintaining a diary writing in every detail of expenses I made which again I learnt from her. Now don’t get me wrong. My parents had taught me all of that. But I was just too lazy and used to do it as a task because I have been instructed to do that and not willingly. She forced me to wake up early and accompany her for morning walks and watching sunrises. Every night I slept promising her that I would and then every morning would wake up to be the crankiest person and come up with different reasons for not getting up. But she won’t buy any of that and drag me literally out of bed.

At work, we had cubes right besides each other. We learnt the same things at work / had more or less similar assignments and would discuss it back home until midnight. Our Manager started calling us “Changu-Mangu” . I remember M telling me once then – “You know, you and her fall in Varan Bhaat category”. (So there are apparently three categories- Pizza / Pavbhaaji and Sadha varan Bhaat i.e plain Dal and Rice) Yes, and it was true indeed. Eventually S (her hubby) told her “You know what – you and K fall in BaavLat category” (Apparently anybody can fool you category) which also was sadly true. We took Rangoli , yoga and Naturopathy classes together. We also tried taking an unsuccessful Beautician class.

Anyway, with time gradually we started discussing about books / philosophy / yoga and Life! And each one of us started having an enormous amount of influence on the other in every aspect unknowingly. We became each other’s dumping bags (no –not punching bags!). Like venting out our worries / fears / problems / concerns / negativities – and the other would provide an unwavering support , patient ear and comfort no matter what. We were there for each other either mending the broken hearts or spirits.

Time flew. Circumstances changed. The journey continued. Studies brought me here and I left my job. With our busy schedules we did manage to update each other through emails and phone calls. I got her emails before my exams wishing me good luck and I talked to her in all her sleepless nights when she was expecting.

Be it the precious moments of getting married / buying homes / having babies (she has one now  ) we made sure that the other is a part of the process.

She was with me holding my hand (literally) on the toughest day of my life – sharing the silence and the pain. Yesterday, I got an email from her. She had lost someone close – very close to her. I felt bad that I couldn’t be with her physically at this point in life. All I was going to do was offer my condolences over phone. For which I had no words. With shivering hands , watery eyes and a very heavy heart I did manage to call her. And we talked. Knowing that I was struggling for words she did all the talking – answering all my unasked questions , assuring me that she was doing much better now after 15 days.Pouring her heart out . And making me realize that between friends distance doesn’t really matter . What matters is being there !!!

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